I’ve
read a lot lately about being introverts and how it affects a person’s life,
namely needing time alone to recharge. But the other day I saw this title:
“Leave me alone, but I also want to be included”, and it instantly reminded me
of something that happened to me.
I
was finally getting over a cold, no longer contagious, but couldn’t go more
than a few hours without a nebulizing treatment. There was a family activity at
church, involving board games. All my kids wanted to go and my husband talked
me into it, after all, churches have electricity and my nebulizer was portable.
Once
there, I sat, near an outlet. I thought it was a good spot, near the door,
where everyone coming in would see me and with several fun games in front of
me, I figured someone would join me as soon as things got started.
It
was held in a large gym and I knew it would be difficult to hear my quiet voice
if everyone was socializing. Also, as shy as I am, starting any conversations
was out of the question. Besides, I couldn’t wander around because of my asthma
and my bad back, aggravated by my excess weight.
Then
people started coming in and mingling.
I’m
not saying no one talked to me. Several people said hi as they brushed past me,
but that was about the extent of it. Not one person sat down and offered to
play even one game, except my own family.
For
nearly an hour.
Not
even the friendliest people there.
After
being pretty much ignored by everyone else, I asked my husband to take me
home.
Anyway,
I thought of all of this and wondered how often we as writers think about why a
character sits quietly in a corner.
Are
they shy or an introvert? Or is it health reasons? Or, like me, a combination
of all three.
Do
we consider how these people feel about being left by themselves? Do the others
around them even notice that they are there or when they leave?
I
once had a lady enthusiastically tell me about a recent party, and something
funny that happened at it, saying I’d missed the fun and I should make the next
one.
All
well and good, except I’d been beside her when the funny event occurred. Yeah,
I walked out early, because no one was talking to me anyway, but I’d still been
there.
Do
you have characters who experience that?
When
Bonnie needs to write the shy characters she comes to me precisely because I
understand them so well.
Now
the outgoing, extroverts, I have to ask Bonnie though I suppose I could ask my
oldest daughter. She gets that sort too.
Smile.
Make the day a brighter day.
