Of Elusive Smells and Clutter by Konnie Enos

 

It all started with an unidentifiable unpleasant smell.

My daughter, and to a lesser extent my son, have an acute sense of smell. At least they can smell things that their dad and I can’t. Now, where I’m concerned, that’s easy to understand. My olfactory nerve hasn’t been functioning properly for years and COVID sure didn’t help matters. So while it does work, I wouldn’t say it’s doing the best job right now.

Anyway a few days ago my daughter started complaining about the smell in our bedroom. Even though it hasn’t been a week since the last time we washed all our bedding, my husband took all the blankets that get the most use and rewashed them. He even took the sheet we’ve been using as a curtain down and washed it. He also opened out the windows to air things out.

I kind of assumed it was the curtain/sheet because I don’t think it’s been washed in years. But we also don’t usually open our windows so airing it out could help too.

I was hopeful. I mean, I still couldn’t smell anything.

No such luck.

The very next day both were in my room, working in tandem to determine where it was coming from. They were walking around my room, sniffing.

I’m thinking they’re going to say it is on or around my bed. And then eliminate Xavier or our bedding. (I’ll admit it. I don’t take a bath every single day. I do, however, bathe regularly and it’s not like I go out and about unwashed.) I figured Xavier was the most likely culprit because he has very smelly farts.

After several minutes of sniffing (literally) around our room they easily eliminated the area around our bed. They then focused on the desk and chair. Then they focused on the dresser, or at least the end of the dresser nearest the desk.

Then my daughter started complaining that the smell was “coming and going”. It was while she was complaining about it that I actually got a very brief whiff of this mystery smell. My son said he’d thought it was coming from our vent but it made so sense since the vent was nearest our bed and it wasn’t on that end of the room.

Anyway, in the end, they were unsuccessful in tracking down what is causing that scent. My son now thinks they are going to have to at least completely empty the dresser and move every last thing in that corner by where it was the strongest and scrub everything.

The only actual furniture there is the dresser and the shelf that sits across the top of it. It is a long eight drawer dresser, and the shelf isn’t small either. The hardest part of the whole thing would be the dresser and shelf are crammed full. Not to mention the pile of stuff packed into the corner by that end of the dresser.

It’d take a couple of days just to clear everything besides the furniture out.

None of us feel like taking on that task so they started trying to figure out other options.

My son’s suggestion was to spray some Febreze in here. He at least asked if he could.

No. Not unless I’m not in here and not apt to be for at least an hour. I prefer breathing, and believe it or not, Febreze does have a scent. One that kicks off my allergies and asthma. Spraying Lysol isn’t possible for the same reasons.

As of writing this, they have not yet found the source of the smell or attempted to spray any scent inhibitors. Meaning the mystery hasn’t been solved yet, though I have no doubt my daughter will renew the investigation the next time she is annoyed by that elusive scent.

Had I not gotten that one brief whiff of it, I might assume they were making it up in order to get us to clean our cluttered room. On one hand, I’d love to declutter our room. On the other hand, cleaning it up won’t help.

Seriously. We’ll clean out the closet or clear his desk, or I’ll try to organize my nightstand better, and it’s back to buried in this mess within a day or two.

Most of the clutter is because I’m married to a pack rat, who inherited his tendencies from his pack rat mother and grandmother. (Not all, because I am trying to cram a lot of stuff into a relatively small area.) So, I feel like I’m fighting a losing battle, and it may be years before we figure that elusive smell out.

Maybe I should just abandon my room for a day and them Febreze and Lysol it to death in hopes it will eradicate that order.

Smile. Make the day a brighter day.

Of Nightmares and Restless Legs by Bonnie Le Hamilton

 

I think I scared poor Patches out of one of his nine lives this past weekend.

Konnie undoubtedly sympathizes with him. She’s experienced it, too. The only thing is, I haven’t done that in decades—at least, I don’t think I have; Tom never complained.

And what is it that I did?

Well, this time it started with a nightmare. I’ve had lots of nightmares over the years, but well, it’s been decades since the last time, that I know of, that I kicked out during the nightmare.

The first recorded time was when we were preschoolers, and Konnie and I shared a twin bed.

She ended up on the floor.

Sorry, Konnie.

There were later complaints by our big sister and the oldest of our little brothers after having to share a queen bed altogether.

Our mother wasn’t pleased to find the blankets on the floor at the foot of the bed every morning either. Actually, neither was our babysitter when we spent the night at her place.

You see, I have this tendency to kick, sometimes a lot at night.

I honestly thought I outgrew it sometime between my early teens when I no longer had to share a bed with anybody, and when I got married, because, like I said, Tom never complained.

But now Patches, if he were human, could testify that I have not stopped doing it.

You see, early Sunday morning, I was in the throes of a vivid nightmare where I was attempting to keep a gunman from entering the place where I was. At some point, I decided pressing my considerable weight against the door wasn’t working and I needed to use my strongest muscle, which is with any woman, my legs.

I kicked out at the door and sent almost everything on my over-the-bed desk sailing off the foot of the bed, where Patches had been sleeping. I opened my eyes in time to see him streak out of the room with his tail all fluffed out.

Most certainly scared and possibly miffed at me. It was hours before he decided to come back into the bedroom.

Though I did realize that when I’m sleeping, or at least trying to sleep, he’s either clear at the foot of the bed, or up by my head. When I’m not trying to sleep, you can usually find him under that desk, and/or on my feet. Now I think he stays away from my legs when I’m sleeping.

Meaning, I have been kicking in my sleep. I just haven’t kicked the blankets off the foot of the bed in decades.

It’s amazing Tom never said anything.

I mean, my siblings were complaining about sharing a bed with me long before our babysitter would put us all in the same queen bed every time we spent the night. And not long after that, our mother made sure we had a twin bed to ourselves. I never had to share again, until I got married. And now I only share with my cat, who is currently curled up at the foot of my bed.

I just find it strange that I thought I’d outgrown that little habit, only to do it again in a most spectacular way.

And believe me, that was quite a mess. The only things left on my desk were one small tray holding some notepads, my laptop, and my CPAP machine. And it’s a good thing those last two didn’t go sailing.

The one I regretted the most was that cup full of my pens, pencils, and extra styluses. What a mess!

And I sincerely hope I never do something like that again!

I had honestly thought that kicking out like that was on par with night terrors, which all children eventually outgrow.

I lived through those. As Konnie knows well. My oldest child did that until he was around six, which included one time when we were visiting Konnie and her family in Washington.

Woke up the whole apartment. Sorry, but I did warn you.

Actually, I have a minor character in one of my stories that has night terrors. She did wake up the whole house, but some of them didn’t know there's a huge difference between nightmares and night terrors.

And maybe I should have a character whose legs move a ton while they are asleep. Not sure, since it’s been a long time since anyone complained about me doing that.

Though I could definitely write a scene where character A lays down for bed then seconds later sits up and starts talking to character B, until character B, in a desperate attempt to get some sleep, punches character A in the eye.

By the way, Jacki, you deserved that black eye!

Anyway, happy writing everyone!

Of Thoughts and Characters by Konnie Enos

When I last wrote a post, I was in Boston visiting my second born child. Since then, I’ve returned home, celebrated the birthday of my third born, and spent a considerable amount of time updating our checkbook registers, not to mention planning this month’s budget.

Of course, there is also all the sleeping I’ve been doing. First because of jetlag. Or maybe that was because I spent over 24 hours awake in my effort to get home. Then I have apparently gotten a slight cold. The only annoying part is feeling like I need to throw up.

So, with everything going on, I have not thought about the fact I had to post today, for days. In fact, though I was remembering it was my turn this week, I somehow missed that it was already Wednesday until my middle of the night trip to the bathroom. Thankfully, I have an alarm already set so that I’ll have time to deal with it. I crawled back in bed assured my alarm would wake me up in time.

What I hadn’t planned on was I’d turn my alarm off and go back to sleep. I think the only thing that woke me up was realizing Xavier had just jumped off my bed and Jerry wasn’t in it. Of course, then I had to set up my laptop, open Word, then stare at a blank page for a minute.

Then the alarm saying it was time to feed the pets went off. Thankfully, all I had to do was turn that one off because Jerry was already dealing with it. But knowing I had only about a quarter of my post written and now less than an hour to do it in didn’t help.

Neither did Jerry trying to talk to me. I was right in the middle of a thought, and he threw me right out of it. Worse still, I had no interest in obsessing over what he was fixating on now.

I told him I was busy and to leave me alone, which he didn’t do, and I had to repeat that at least three times. I finally yelled at him again then focused on my screen hoping re-reading the last paragraph would get me back in the flow of my thoughts again. Jerry accused me of reading again.

“No! I’m writing! I told you I was busy. Leave me alone.”

He finally left me alone.

Then I was again stuck trying to stimulate ideas again, which is something I’ve been spending a great deal of time thinking about recently.

One thing I know about good stories is they always have some obstacles that the main characters must overcome somehow. You have to find the right roadblocks to throw up for them so that your story is interesting and believable.

But there is also the issue of not using overworked scenarios, trite storylines, or stereotyped characters. At one point, I also noticed that far too many of my characters had the same features. Short leading ladies is one I use far too often.

I do understand it. If you are writing from what you know, then using characters you can emphasize with makes sense. Knowing this, I’ve tried hard to vary my leading ladies, though I’m afraid they are all still short.

But another thing I’ve noticed is the tendency to stick to similar story lines. All of them seem to have the exact same, or similar elements in them. Some of those being the ages, physical characteristics and even the talents or activities of the main characters. But it could also be the types of obstacles they face. Or even the names you choose.

Now, obviously, you’re going to stick to the elements of the genre you’re writing so things like the obstacles they face are probably going to be similar. However, the characteristics of your characters don’t all have to be from a template.

You’re leading ladies don’t all have to be petite any more than your leading men must be tall dark and handsome. Personality traits and talents can also be quite varied.

Though the one I find the hardest is naming all my characters. If you are writing sci-fi or fantasy you can make up names. For anything else you have to find names that fit the era and the story.

From experience, I know the first names you’re going to pull out of the hat are ones with which you are most familiar. Anything else and you need to do some research just to name them.

So, I find myself wondering how other writers overcome the issues of their characters, in their different stories, all feeling like they’re from a template.

How do you vary your characters?

Smile. Make the day a brighter day.

 

Writing Male Characters by Bonnie Le Hamilton

 

Recently, while browsing the internet, I came upon a blog post about bad writing tips for women writing male characters. Of course, I was interested because I’m Konnie’s go-to person when she’s having trouble with her male characters. And I use male POVs a lot. I wanted to make sure I was doing it right, because, you know, I am a woman.

For starters, the post is at howtodothewritething.com and it is titled, “If You’re a Woman Writing a Male Character Avoid these Bad Writing Tips.”

From the title, I was afraid that I might be using bad writing tips.

I am not.

Actually, I’ve never even heard these bad writing tips the author mentions.

So far so good.

I particularly like what he said about emotionless robots. But then I am a fan of Data. Heck, I am a fan of Spock! Then there is also Seven-of-Nine, too.

However, when I read that, for some strange reason I started thinking about a female character in a certain sci-fi series. Said character is emotionless, or rather appears to be. She is a well-written and pivotal character for the series. And I promise, she isn’t totally emotionless, she just hides her feelings really well.

And if you want to read this story, I am afraid it isn’t published yet; I just know the author oh probably better than anybody else, certainly longer.

The author is Konnie. Enough said.

There is some exceptional advice in the aforementioned post, so it should really be a must-read for everyone.

And no, Konnie, it is not going to help you with the issues you usually have with male characters, but I am still right here!

However, the best tip I read in this post was about being true to your character. A tip that is helpful for any character you are writing.

I have no idea how many times either Konnie or I have said to the other, “He/She wouldn’t do that!” while talking about a character the other one has written.

I do it most often when it's Konnie’s male characters, and she’s said it a few times over my less strong female characters. I’ve said it more than Konnie has.

She has in fact only helped me with a couple of female characters I described as timid and or fearful. Clearly, I don’t know how that would work. Without Konnie, I wouldn’t have been able to write them.

Konnie has trouble with her male characters constantly.

“Uh, no, a guy would not say that.” “Uh, no, a guy would not react that way.” Yeah, I say those two a lot.

With Konnie, she’d be saying, “(insert character name) would not react that way! She’s shy/timid/fearful, you need to fix this.”

As you can see, her comments are specific to a character whereas mine are more gender related. I’m not saying I haven’t made character-specific comments, but more often than not Konnie’s issues with male characters are more gender related than character-related.

My few issues with my female characters have always been character-related rather than gender.

Sometimes I actually wonder why I get my male characters so right.

Is it because growing up, most of my friends were guys? In those younger years, I remember one girl who was for a short time my best friend, but she had like five or six big brothers and no sisters. We got along great until my family moved, again.

And the one person who was my best friend for the longest time was my cousin, Jon.

It only changed when I hit puberty, and I no longer liked “cops and robbers” and other rough-and-tumble games.

And it isn’t like I haven’t doubted if I have my characters right. I have doubted. One time an older male friend of mine didn’t like a scene I’d written where three buddies were discussing each other’s choice of a spouse. The older gentleman said no decent man would disparage their friends’ women in that manner.

The only thing is they were not really disparaging their friends’ choices, they were merely saying they wouldn’t have picked that person.

I got so worried I hadn’t written the scene in a believable manner I finally broke down and read the scene to my husband to see if he thought they were acting out of character. I figured he was a better choice because he was in the age group of the characters during the time of the story.

Tom informed me it was totally accurate. Actually, what he was, “Guys do talk like that.”

How do you handle writing characters of the opposite gender? Do you need help? Or can you usually manage?

Anyway, happy writing everyone!