Of Birthdays and Colds By Konnie Enos

Yesterday I called Bonnie and she could easily tell I am rather sick. She was concerned about me being able to write my post today, but I told her I should still be able to write it. Then I promptly forgot about writing my post in favor of taking care of myself, including taking some naps.

I, in fact, so completely forgot about that I did not remember until one of my several middle of the night trips to the bathroom. And I only remembered it then because my son apparently forgot that today is garbage day.

How did going to the bathroom remind me of that fact?

Because he had not emptied the garbage can in our bathroom, or in fact, any cans in our room. Though the only one stuffed full at the moment is the one in our bathroom. (It’s stuffed because it hasn’t been emptied in a couple of weeks simply because it wasn’t full enough to bother until now.)

Now normally my son comes in our room sometime in the evening on Tuesday to make sure all the garbage is gathered but yesterday the only time he came into my room was to get some pain medicine because, surprise, surprise, he’s sick too. (Sore throat and achy.)

Don’t worry, our bins got to the curb this morning. One, because I had to be up early to deal with my post. And two, because my son realized it needed done and got up early to do so.

And as my brain is more focused on bundling up for some warmth and getting any sleep I can, I cannot think of much to say. Though I am currently remembering something that happened Sunday.

We were at church and I overheard someone asking if that day was the fifth or the sixth. Clearly it was not. I told them it was most definitely the fourth since the next day, Monday, was the fifth. I indicated I knew that for a fact because Monday was a certain gentleman’s birthday, while clearly pointing at my husband.

One of the gentlemen there then decided to guess hubby’s age. Now before he did state his guess, he said he wasn’t good at guessing and wanted to guess low. I’m assuming to not offend us. Now this man does know some of our kids and is aware we have grandchildren. He as at least one himself. He also is well on his way to full head of gray hair and otherwise looks the part of a grandfather.

It should also be noted that our kids are all in their early 30s to mid-20s. It would be safe to assume someone with kids near the same age as yours was themselves about the same age as you were.

Not only did he guess low, but he guessed fifteen years too low. I can assure you that we were not in our teens when we married and started a family. We were almost no longer in our 20s. (Our oldest was born less than three months before hubby turned 30.)

Yes, my husband, with his completely gray and receding hair, apparently does not look as old as he is. Then again, our friend was guessing slightly below his own age which happens to be ten years younger than hubby and I are.

Since I’m coughing, sneezing, and attempting to sleep, which is what my body needs right now, I’m going to end here so I do those things.

Take care.

Smile. Make the day a brighter day.

 

Of Memories and Birthdays by Konnie Enos

Recently, I saw an article about the events in our life that we remember clearly even as we age. The point of the article was the more things we remember clearly, the better our memory is overall.

Now I think I have a pretty good memory, and I remember a lot of events from my childhood at least vaguely. Though, I expected to the article to mention specific national news events which most people who lived through them will remember.

Things like the moon landing, walking on the moon. I know it happened, but I have no actual memories of watching it on TV. Though I have to admit I was still pretty young at the time. I was even younger when the Cuban Missile Crisis and JFK’s assassination occurred, so I have no memory of either event.

Though the events in the article were mentioned in broader terms and were personal events rather than national news. Things like the first day of school. Your best friend from grade school. Your first date or kiss.

I have no memory of going to school on my first day of school, it made no impression on me. I do remember our first teacher constantly telling me I was picking up my writing implement with the wrong hand, a lot. I finally learned to only use my right hand for that activity. Of course, I also remember all my teachers complaining about my sloppy handwriting. That is until I started spending my summers filling every leftover notebook I could find practicing my penmanship. (All this was before I figured out that I should have been using my left hand all along.)

As for best friends, we moved so frequently and changed schools so often that I can barely name three friends from grade school. Though one of those I only remember his face and first name. One was actually Bonnie’s friend and again only her first name. The third? I was twelve when we met, so far easier to remember. I also still remember my best friend from 8^th grade, but we’re also still in touch and both grandmas now.

I do remember my first date, even the movies we saw. Song of the South and The Aristocats. I also remember my younger brother watching us and my date disappearing halfway through the first movie. I found him talking to my brother and sister. After I joined them there, he disappeared entirely. Just left. His mom was supposed to give me a lift home, but he was already long gone. I had to go home with my brother and sister, but I don’t remember if Momma picked us up or her husband at the time. That was the last date I had until I was in college so remembering my first kiss was even easier.

The events I remember the clearest are the ones that made the biggest impression on me. I vaguely remember inviting friends to our 8^th birthday party. The party itself is far more memorable since it turned into something of a block party. It was the largest party we ever had.

I also remember our infamous 6^th birthday. From the plants falling on me to Bonnie opening two of everything.

The article also mentioned the Bicentennial and I do remember snippets of those events. Parts of the parade and the party in Ross Park, but I did turn 14 that weekend.

There were other things mentioned in the article that didn’t bring any memory for me, not even the events I knew had to have happened at some point in my life. They just didn’t make a lasting impression on me.

So according to that article, my memory isn’t that good. But I beg to differ. Most of the specific memories they mentioned did not make a lasting impression on me, but I do have lasting memories, some from when I was no more than three years old. True, the older ones are just snippets here and there and the details, names, dates, etc. are vague. The feelings are not through, I remember those. The stronger the feelings from the event, the more likely I am to remember more details.

Things like seeing Grandpa Westover for the last time or waking up Christmas morning with strangers in a strange house. (Both happened before I was five.)

But being the first week of September, and so close after Labor Day, the one memory that I’m thinking about today is the one I so eloquently spoke of in my post of September 2017 “Of Holidays and Other Memories”. And today just happens to be the date Labor Day fell on that year. So 46^th Happy Birthday, Dan.

Smile. Make the day a brighter day.

Of Birthdays and Holidays by Konnie Enos

 

Recently I saw a post where someone asked us to “imagine having a birthday within 2 weeks of Christmas.” Just think about having a birthday anywhere from December 11^th to January 8^th.

Well, that got me thinking.

I know a lot of people with birthdays in that period. I even know some people with birthdays in the first half of December who had complained about having their birthdays overshadowed by Christmas. The most common complaints were getting birthday gifts in Christmas-themed wrapping paper and or receiving just one gift to represent both events. This was particularly bad when it was relatives who gave their siblings two gifts a year, one for each event.

When I learned the due date for my fourth child (oldest son, Tony) all the information I had about December birthdays came back to me. But I had one as yet untapped resource, My cousin was born three days after Christmas, hence the same week my baby was due.

I had an enlightening conversation with my favorite aunt (said cousin’s mother).

She mentioned not only the two complaints mentioned above but also some family and friends who completely ignored that my cousin had a birthday. Yes, he experienced this, and yes, he noticed.

I took note. I even put my foot down. I told my family members they had to treat all my kids equally. Either they gave all of them both a birthday and Christmas gift or gave them one or none. But they could not give my other kids gifts and not my December baby. I wasn’t going to tolerate them overlooking one kid’s birthday just because it was close to Christmas.

I also told them I preferred that birthday gift not be in Christmas-themed wrapping paper. This meant that I could not use Christmas wrapping paper for birthday gifts. Now, as a rule, I could not afford a lot of wrapping paper so I wrapped most of my children’s birthday gifts in groceries bags.

However, one year I did find some birthday-themed wrapping paper and started using that. I ran out just before I needed to wrap my December child’s gift. I kid you not. Even the store where I’d found it before only had Christmas-themed paper in December.

I believe I resorted to using some plain red Christmas wrapping paper. He does like the color red. Now I plan to make sure I still have some birthday-themed wrapping paper when it’s time to wrap birthday presents for my December baby, and also for those people I give birthday gifts to who have birthdays in the above-mentioned period.

And yes, I have more than just that one cousin or my son, Tony, with a birthday so close to Christmas. Looking at my calendar I also have two nieces, another cousin, my son-in-law, my husband, and a sister-in-law and her late husband with birthdays between December 11^th and January 8^th. And those are just the ones I know about.

Then again, I also thought of all the people who have birthdays on, or extremely near, major holidays. Imagine people overlooking your birthday because it is within days of Thanksgiving, Easter, New Year’s, Labor Day, or national independence days (like July 4^th).

Try planning a birthday party on or near your birthday when it happens to be on or near a major holiday. All your friends ended up declining the invitation because their parents said, “that’s family time.”

Growing up, Bonnie and I had the best attendance at our birthday parties when we planned them for at least a week after the actual event. I think our biggest birthday party was when our big day was on a Monday, though just the one year, which happened to be 1976. With the fourth on Sunday, our town had a huge celebration on Monday. So it felt like the whole town was celebrating with us.

There are also our two youngest brothers. One was born on Labor day and the other on the last Friday of November. I’m not sure Labor Day had as much of an effect on my baby brother, but my other brother felt it. Far too often his friends weren’t available to celebrate with him because they were celebrating Thanksgiving with extended family.

So, as the Christmas season quickly approaches, I think not only about those numerous family members who deal with birthdays far too close to the event but also everyone whose birthday gets overshadowed by a major holiday.

As the holidays approach, think about the people you know who have birthdays on or near that major event. They want others to recognize their birthday the same way they do everybody else’s.

Smile. Make the day a brighter day.

Of Celebrations and Milestones by Konnie Enos

As humans, we make a habit of celebrating events and milestones in our lives, from a baby’s birth, through their first tooth and on through graduations, marriage, etc. As the years pile on, we celebrate those. Some more than others.

I’ve personally celebrated numerous events and milestones in my lifetime. Milestones like graduating high school or getting my associate’s degree in both arts and science. Events like birthdays, marriages, baptisms, and anniversaries. I even remember the momentous occasion of celebrating our nation’s 200^th birthday. Thanks to when our birthday is, we also celebrated our 14^th birthday that weekend.

I’ve celebrated my silver wedding anniversary with all my children around me. (This was a few years ago before any of them were married, or had boy/girlfriends.)

You can celebrate triumphs (like graduating), or remember anniversaries, some happy (marriage) and others not so much (9-11).

We celebrate and remember a number of events in our lives. People say for every day of the year someone, somewhere, is celebrating or remembering some event.

If you look at holidays, I think August is the only month of the year (in America) where there isn’t some sort of holiday unless you add in Jewish holidays. Some months have more than one.

Some people celebrate being “over the hill”. I can remember throwing such a party for our mother when she was 30. When we hit 30, they’d moved that mark to 40. With more people living longer, I expect them to eventually move it to 50.

Wedding anniversaries are always celebrated. When I was younger, people noted the first anniversary than paid little attention until they made their silver and golden anniversaries (25 and 50 years). Today radio host Delilah will sing a special ‘anniversary’ song to anyone who calls requesting a dedication for 10 or more years of marriage. You see newspaper articles about couples who’ve made 50 years of marriage. They should do one on my aunt and uncle who’ve been married at least 60 years now. (Apparently, today it’s far more common to fall short of 10 years of marriage than it is to exceed it.) My husband and I will be celebrating 30 years in November.

But by far the most common celebration for each day of the year is someone’s birthday. People produce lists, even books, about famous people “born on this day”.  Families make videos of a child’s first birthday. (I did once but I never had a camera to do so with my other children.) They do videos to celebrate learning the gender of their unborn child. Videos of multiple life events are all over social media.

Bearing in mind just how many people could have a birthday on any given day, not long ago my son told me he’d met someone born on the same day I was. I pondered that for a minute. To the best of my knowledge, I have met exactly one other person, in my entire life, who has the same day of birth that I do. Bonnie. I’ve met dozens of people born that week, either before or after my birthday, but none born on that day. All things considered a rather amazing thing.

Of course, when it comes right down to it, nobody thinks about or remembers dates/events with no meaning to them.

We remember the bicentennial because it was such a huge celebration, but we find it hard to remember exact events from all the other July 4’s we’ve celebrated. I can remember events from the Christmas I was ten, but others are harder to distinguish.

Few people old enough to remember that day can’t remember exactly what they were doing when they heard on 9-11-2001. Just like those old enough to remember JFK’s assassination or the attack on Pearl Harbor.

We etch the biggest events in our memory forever.

 We all have such days, both big and little. The monumental ones whole nations can’t forget and the little ones that only mean something to you or your family.

So today, I’m asking you to ponder tomorrow.

Does March 19 bear any significance in your life or is it just another Thursday?

Personally, I shall always remember March 19 as the day I finally became a grandmother to my beautiful, precious, and very gorgeous first grandchild. My darling Emma May Plagmann who is one year old tomorrow. Grandma love’s Emma.

Smile. Make the day a brighter day.