Of Gratitude, Kindness and Happiness by Konnie Enos

Sunday at church, one of the ladies mentioned gratitude journals. Now I’d heard of them but wasn’t exactly sure how you’re supposed to utilize them. She mentioned the idea was to list three things each day, for a month, that you’re grateful for.

Considering November (the month of gratitude) starts this week I thought she was trying to encourage us to keep such a journal between now and Thanksgiving.

But then she changed the subject.

She started asking others how they felt when they did acts of service. She was focusing on how good you feel when you do things to help, or lift, someone else.

It didn’t take long for me to begin wondering what acts of service had to do with gratitude journals. And I might have pondered that question further but by that point they’d began listing things they could do in service to others.

My mind immediately went to the big things people do but no one mentioned volunteering at a care center or animal shelter. Not one person mentioned reading to the blind or helping with a cleaning up a public space, or our church building. Not one big grand act of service even though I’m sure all of them could come up with some.

I could come up with a long list of things they could have listed but instead of thinking about what those might be, I focused on the things they were mentioning.

Things like smiling or saying hi to someone. Calling a friend, just to talk. Sending a card or note to someone. Actively listening when someone wants to talk to you.

Things you can do every single day.

Things that are small, and easy to do.

Things that don’t come with fan fair or awards but can seriously brighten someone else’s day. It wasn’t a list of services rendered so much as it was list of kindnesses given.

Finally, I was wondering again why she’d mentioned gratitude journals than went off on the tangent of acts of service, or kindness.

The conversation itself wasn’t very long, probably about ten minutes, but it was only at the end that she finally said why she’d mentioned the gratitude journals.

She wondered, if possibly, instead of focusing on what you are grateful for in a gratitude journal, if perhaps we could focus on our three acts of service/kindness each day. Not only what they were, but how they made us feel.

So, I’ve been contemplating what she said since then.

Since, in the U.S. we celebrate Thanksgiving in November, it’d be an obvious time to keep a gratitude journal. But December comes right after November.

December, when we celebrate the birth of Christ.

A time when we are often asked to contemplate what gift we can give Christ for his birthday. The most often mentioned gift to give Christ is our acts of service/kindness.

Now this lady was talking about doing a kindness log rather than a gratitude journal, but I’ve been thinking about something a bit different.

You see, science has shown that being grateful increases your happiness just as being kind increases your happiness.

So, wouldn’t expressing your gratitude AND showing kindness work together to increase your happiness?

I mean we could just focus on gratitude in November and kindness in December, but what if we did both, each month?

What if, for two whole months, we worked on showing three acts of kindness to others every day? And what if while we also thought about three things we were grateful for?

How much happier would we each be for being so grateful, and for showing such kindness? How much happiness could we each spread out into the world by doing this?

Me personally, I probably won’t write down, or even track anything, but I think just making the effort to show kindness, and expressing my gratitude daily would be just as effective.

But mostly I’ve been thinking about service/kindness is a very simple thing. As simple as smiling. Just smiling.

As I say at the end of all my posts, “Smile. Make the day a brighter day.”

I’m not asking you to keep a gratitude journal, or a kindness log, or even both. Any of which would be a good thing to do. But I think contemplating on what we are grateful for and showing our gratitude through service/kindness to others would be a way to lift not only our spirits, but those of the people around us too.

So, all I’m asking is be mindful of your gratitude and the kindness you give.

Smile. Make the day a brighter day.

 

Counting Blessings by Konnie Enos

 

This past Thursday, with the words of the hymn “Count Your blessings” going through my mind, and knowing this post needed to be up the day before Thanksgiving. I decided to count mine. The Prophet Russel M. Neilson gave his talk about gratitude the next day.

Here is my list.

·         My legs. While I did break my back nearly 50 years ago, I didn’t damage my spinal cord and I still have full use of my legs.

·         My eyes. I do need glasses and right now cataracts are making seeing difficult, but I can still read and write.

·         My hands. Recently I’ve been spending a lot of time with numb fingers from carpal tunnel, but my hands still work and I can generally do what I need to, including typing.

·         My ears. I have tinnitus but it isn’t annoying and usually quiet enough that I can hear just fine.

·         My brain. At my age, my memory isn’t wonderful and my kids are always commenting on one more thing I seem to have forgotten. However, I can still think, imagine, create, even form opinions. I can also still remember most things.

·         My height. I might not be tall but I can still reach the bottom shelf of the cupboards and I have my step stool for those higher things. Plus, I have tall kids who are willing to help.

·         My children. All my children have Autism or ADD/ADHD or some combination thereof. Add in some bipolar and anxiety or PTSD and yes, my kids have been a handful, but I love them all and couldn’t imagine my world without them. I also totally adore, my son-in-law. He is the best father and most loving husband. Then there is my adorable granddaughter which we wouldn’t have if he hadn’t joined the family.

·         My husband. He is the sweetest, most loving man even if he is completely clueless about how irritating he can be. I would not be at all surprised to learn he, and his youngest sister, are on the spectrum. That might explain my kids.

·         My house. Yes, it is fifteen years old and desperately in need of some repairs. Appliances are a priority. Painting walls, replacing flooring, and curtains, even putting in much-needed screens can wait. The walls and doors are solid and the roof doesn’t leak.

·         My help. My youngest son and daughter are doing their best to help with all the chores including each taking a turn to cook dinner.

·         Our water heater. You don’t know what a convenience this is until you have a go a day or two without it. We were even blessed to be able to replace ours fairly quickly with only a little bit of headache.

·         Our A/C. In the desert, A/Cs are essential. Being without ours for a few days while the temps were still in the triple digits was not pleasant. Fortunately, it was quickly repaired.

·         Our car. I’m not fond of having such a high car payment, but at least the car runs well, we can get everywhere we need to be.

·         My clothes. I realize I don’t have much because it’s really, really difficult to find things that fit and are modest on my petite ball of a frame. So I’m grateful I can find somethings that do fit (Thank you, Woman Within). At least I don’t have my daughter’s problems. She is a petite bean pole, a skinny one, so it’s harder to find things that fit. She has fewer clothes than I do.

·         My shoes. I only wear shoes when I have to, but mine are in good shape and fit my small feet. (Yeah, children’s shoe department.)

·         My country. Right things are a mess and I’m not sure it will ever return to normal. We can still choose where to live, where to work, what to eat or wear, and what education to get and where to get it. We can still form our own opinions. This is still the land of the free.

·         My Lord and Savior, my faith. It’s the most important. Without God we are nothing. With him we are everything.

Whether or not you participated in his challenge, I’d like to challenge you to write up a list of the things you’re grateful for and post them. Respond here, post them on your social media, or just hang them up somewhere in your home where you can see them daily.

Also, while you are writing your list, remember Betsy ten Boom’s gratitude for fleas and lice. She could see how the pests were blessing them. So let us see the silver lining in all our circumstances.

Smile. Make the day a brighter day.