You
hear all sorts of things about bad parenting styles. Right now the biggest hype
is all about “helicopter parenting”. It’s not the only one, just one you hear
the most often and usually about how it’s so bad for the kids.
In
fact, whenever I hear about a new “parenting style” it’s usually something
pointing out how it is so wrong. The parents are doing this that or the other
thing wrong. They are harming their kids in this that or the other way. Or they
simply aren’t teaching their kids properly in some fashion or another.
It’s
gotten so bad they even have a name for it, “mom shaming”.
You
make any comment on line about how you are taking care of your family or
raising your kids and someone, somewhere is going to come out of the woodwork
and point out all the things you are doing so so wrong because you are not
doing it how they would do it. They will even quote studies that support them
in their opinions.
Unfortunately
that’s how this anti-vaxer movement got so rampant. One little, completely
falsified and now totally discredited study because it could not be
scientifically duplicated (note: because the data was falsified) saying vaccines
cause autism and all these people are now waving that one study around
insisting it’s fact. And ignoring the thousands of studies which proved he’d falsified
his data.
What
I’m saying is for every opinion there is going to be an “article” somewhere
that will agree with it. But just because the article exists doesn’t mean its
fact or even that your opinion has any merit in the situation for which you are
throwing it around.
Lately
I’ve seen dozens of articles and comments about how our children now coming
into adulthood are NOT being prepared for the real world. Most of them are
complaints about how the school system here in America is failing our kids because
they aren’t ready for the real world.
I
have to agree. The system as it stands now is failing our kids. They aren’t
doing the job of educating our future generations for the future. BUT—and
this a huge one—we has the parents are failing them too. When did it become the
schools job to teach our children how to do laundry and wash dishes or keep a
budget?
Someone
please tell me when it became wrong for a parent to give their children chores?
When did it become wrong to make a child pick up their own toys, wash dishes,
do laundry or mow the lawn, or cook dinner? Are they never going to have to do
those things when they become adults?
Tell
me, how many of you got to the ripe old age you are now without sewing on a
button, ironing a shirt, washing dishes, cooking a full meal (not just nuking a
TV dinner), balancing a checkbook, filling a gas tank and changing a tire? How
many of those things do you still have to do on a regular, or semi-regular
basis?
Don’t
you think our children need to learn them too?
I
found this article on Love What Matters, a mom, Brooke Hampton, wrote about her
parenting style, which she calls “lazy mom”. She also tells about how people
came out of the woodwork trying to shame her for being a “bad” parent.
How
is she lazy?
She
gives her kids chores. In fact, her daughter does the grocery budget for their
family.
Is
she lazy?
Maybe.
Is
her daughter learning how to budget money and do the grocery shopping for a
family? YES! Is that skill she’ll need some day? I would assume even if she
remains single she will have to buy herself groceries so most definitely-- YES!
My
point is, while people are complaining that the school system isn’t preparing
kids for the real world they are also shaming parents who are actually doing a
really good job of guess what--- PREPARING THEIR KIDS FOR THE REAL WORLD!
Yes, schools could do a better job, but so could we, as a general
population. I think we all need to remember that age old saying, “If
you can’t say something nice, don’t say anything at all.”
Then
there is the one that says something along the lines of when you are pointing
fingers at others, you have three pointing back at yourself. Or something like
that.
I
personally am all for chores and teaching kids how to sew, cook, clean, and do
their own laundry, grocery shopping, and finances.
At
least I can say mine can wash their dish and clothes, and buy and cook their
food. I got to be doing something right.
Smile.
Make the day a brighter day.