Of Learning Things and Small Annoyances by Konnie Enos

 

Over this past week, I’ve learned a couple of things.

First of all, as our loyal readers know, I’m ambidextrous because my very first teacher was old-school about handiness. Since I usually write with my right hand, I’ve always assumed few people would notice I’m predominately left-handed. I’ve certainly never given it a second thought.

Until this week.

By the weird circumstance of just being me, I occasionally have some injury/ailment that baffles me. These issues are usually fleeting enough that trying to present them to a doctor is futile because once I decide to see the doctor, they’ll disappear on their own.

This week my injury has been something affecting my left thumb. For the most part, I can use it, but some motions are uncomfortable. You know, stuff like the pincher move. Even typing has proved problematic if I forget and use that thumb.

Since it hurts, I’ve been attempting to not use that hand, or at least my thumb.

Would you all now kindly attempt to strap yourself into a car without using your left thumb? How about picking up your laptop or full water bottle that is positioned on your left to the point you cannot reach them with your right hand without twisting your body or moving?

Yeah. It’s been an interesting week.

Then there is discovering all the things I automatically do with my left hand, even though I could do them right-handed. Like flipping the top of my water bottle open. I’ve had to remind myself several times this week not to do that.

So despite the fact I already knew I used both hands, I’ve been learning this week just how often and for how many things I use my left hand.

Now on to the second thing I’ve learned.

For background, on February 8^th the oldest of my husband’s brothers passed away. Please note, my husband’s siblings are all younger than he is, his brothers by several years.

This necessitated his traveling to Oregon to attend the funeral. Plus, he gets to spend time with our grandbabies. Before he left he’d asked me about how I’d handle him being gone. Basically, he wanted to know If I’d miss him.

It’s not like we haven’t been apart from time to time in our marriage. I mean he was in the navy, and he did go out to sea, while I was pregnant. And that’s not the only time we’ve ended up spending a month or more apart for whatever reason.

I am also perfectly capable of driving myself where I need to go and dealing with daily household stuff without him. (Okay, so yeah, I do rely on our kids a great deal, but they can do things I can’t. Like reaching the top shelf or the bottom of the washer.)

And yes, I don’t care for sleeping in this bed alone, but I’ve managed before, so I can do it again.

And things around here were just fine, almost normal.                                                         

Until I had to be the designated driver for Royce (who still doesn’t have a license). Until I had to be the one getting up in the middle of the night to let Mabel, and sometimes Xavier, out while also annoying Melinda for all the times I slept right through them asking to be let out because they never once came to my side and pawed at me like they do Jerry. (I do understand Melinda’s annoyance since those were the times Mabel relieved herself inside instead.) Until I was the only one who could get up every 12 hours at seven on the dot to feed fur babies. Until I had to argue with my sons to go feed Jerry’s dog because I’m not going there.

I mean he’s a big loveable fur ball and I know he’d never intentionally hurt me, but he can look me in the eye while standing on all four paws. I do not need the big oaf jumping on me in his excitement. And I think at least half his excitement is because he wants to play. So yeah, I’m not going there.

Originally Jerry wasn’t sure how long he’d stay in Oregon because he wanted to see his other siblings, and our daughter, while he was there. Totally understandable, but I was getting frustrated enough to think about asking him to come home as soon as possible.

Luckily, I didn’t have to.

He decided on his own it was time to come home. Now I just have to convince someone else to deal with airport traffic and pick him up, this afternoon!

Smile. Make the day a brighter day.

The Weather and Other Things by Bonnie Le Hamilton

 

Good morning, all. At least I hope it is a good morning. Right now, I’m praying I can get out of my apartment this morning. I have an appointment.

Yesterday, Valentine’s Day, my hometown got a ton of snow. Loads of schools were closed, and my office shut down early because of it. And believe me, the roads were bad. I was late for work, not because I left late but because I didn’t dare go anywhere near the speed limit. So, what was generally about a half-hour drive roundtrip took me twice that amount of time.

Meaning when I got home I had to call the two worrywarts in my life. The first call was to my sister-in-law because she lives in this town too, she knew what the weather was like, and knows my usual schedule. When I called, she was about to call me to check on me.

The second call wasn’t as urgent because of the possibility that Konnie didn’t know what the weather was like up here. Her being in Vegas and all. And she doesn’t watch the news much.

FYI, Vegas got a light drizzle for Valentine’s Day.

But we did discuss what we’d both be doing this morning. Newsflash, we’re both busy.

One of Jerry’s brothers died this last week, and Jerry needs to fly up to Oregon to attend the funeral. This morning Konnie’s going to be traveling to and from the airport in Vegas, during rush hour. Me? I’m going to the eye surgeon’s office for cataract surgery on my left eye.

Next Wednesday I get the right one done.

That is if I can get out there this Wednesday.

I repeat, we got a lot of snow yesterday. And it was still coming down when I entered my apartment yesterday after work. My friend and neighbor, who promised to drive me to my appointment, called to let me know last night that some roads were closed.

Great.

On top of that, I have to go without food or water until after the surgery. Right now, my mouth is dry.

Yeah, I’m not looking forward to the next several hours. And I get to do this all over again next week! Ick.

And my calendar is full for the next several days as well. Not that I will be able to manage to make all of that. I don’t think I will.

I just hope I’ll be able to get to my writing while I heal, but even that is in question. The surgery is on my eye after all.

I just checked the weather. The sun is out, but it's in the single digits out there. This is going to be fun. I hope the trucks have already been by salting the roads because they are going to be treacherous.

On to other topics.

Has anyone been writing lately?

Personally, I have been trying but all I’ve gotten done is rereading old, unfinished manuscripts.

I am trying. And I have done some editing. Just no actual writing. Unless you count writing an outline to eventually train new volunteers to help in the office. It is a daunting task since there are so many rules and regulations we must follow, not the least of which is HIPPA. And I get the joy of training them when I’ve only been doing the job for less than a year.

The thing is, it's longer than my immediate superior has been doing the job.

My old boss retired; I have a new boss.

And before you ask, I am not qualified for the job, let alone I can’t work full time, so no, I did not apply to replace her when she retired. I haven’t even got a college degree. And again, I can’t work full time.

Frankly, I don’t want the job. I like being able to stay in the office and work instead go out in the field.

Which is another thing, I have to help train volunteers to go out in the field. Then again I get the technical side and my boss gets the field side of the training since that entails the volunteer shadowing my boss as she’s out in the field.

And, in case you didn’t know. Her job is to perform routine spot inspections of nursing and assisted living facilities as well as to help the residents advocate for themselves.

My job is to enter her notes into the database. Which is quite easy for me. Traveling to all the facilities in something like eight or nine counties isn’t something I’d like to do, ever. And then there’s the interacting with all the people in those facilities. Yeah, I’m glad it’s not my job.

Anyway, I hope everyone is well and safe, and happy writing everyone! 

Of Busy Days and Late Nights by Konnie Enos

 

Yesterday, realizing it was my turn to do our post, I made a great effort to deal with some things I needed to get done, like laundry. I figured once I had everything squared away I’d have a few hours to figure out what I was going to write about today.

I thought I was doing pretty good. I cooked breakfast and did some dishes and other household chores. I started doing the laundry that needed to be done and then I sat down to deal with making some appointments that were needed, all of which required some phone calls.

I made two appointments and updated the family calendar to reflect those and a couple of others that had been made in the last couple of days for me and other family members.

In between all of this, I did a total of three loads of laundry. I’m aware this doesn’t sound like much, but I had impediments. Between my height constraints and my bad back, I could not get the loads from the washer to the dryer or retrieve them from the dryer. It can be time-consuming to get others to help me with such tasks because they are all already busy with their own needed tasks.

Once the clothes were dried, I managed to fold and put them away. I know, a bit of a miracle to get any loads of laundry clear through the washing, drying, and putting away all in one day, let alone two. I did three loads yesterday but the third is still sitting in the laundry basket waiting to be dealt with.

I also made dinner last night and cleaned up afterward.

All in all, I had a productive day but at the end of the day, and already thinking of bed, even though I had yet to start my post, I was again waiting for assistance to complete one final task. Remake our bed. That third load was our sheets and pillowcases.

While waiting for my husband’s assistance, I did some internet browsing in hopes of finding a spark of an idea for this post.

I had thought about writing about some of the funny things my kids have said and done in the last couple of days but apparently, I’m going to have to start writing them down as they happen because my memory is only allowing me to remember I had some really good belly laughs this week.

This realization brought me to the fact that my memory isn’t what it used to be. I mean I do work on it, but I can forget things people have asked me to do. Or things I’ve told myself I need to do. Notes and lists have become the norm for me. But it's always nice to see the checkmarks beside everything that I’ve done that day.

So last night, as it was already getting late enough to consider going to bed, and I’d sort of come up with an idea for this post, I was ready to get my husband to help me make the bed so that I could work on my post and hopefully get enough sleep before I had to be up this morning.

I did not get the bed made.

Jerry decided the middle of the night was the perfect time to have a long phone conversation with his sister. Not disturbing in and of itself but he did this sitting beside me with the phone on speaker. Once I realized it was well after midnight with no end in sight, I gave up and went to bed, without sheets or pillowcases.

I was also intelligent enough to also set an alarm to wake me up far earlier than I normally would. When it went off this morning I seriously considered slamming it off and going back to sleep. I certainly wish I’d still been asleep for this past hour instead of dealing with this post. I may end up taking a rare nap today.

Oh, and the reason my husband felt it was appropriate to have a long, late-night conversation with his sister is that the oldest of his two younger brothers is in the hospital and it is not looking like he will make it much longer.

Though he was this bad about the time Reeses (Fluffball) and Tiger passed away and managed to rally around, a couple of times. So we are just waiting to see where this latest drawback takes us.

Now I’m hungry and exhausted so after I get this posted I’m getting breakfast and possibly taking a nap.

Smile. Make the day a brighter day.

Update: My brother-in-law died a few hours after this post originally went up.

Differences by Bonnie Le Hamilton

 I really should stop trying to take those online quizzes. They are far from accurate, mostly because they are multiple-choice and not fill-in-the-blank. Case in point, I tried to take one that promised they could predict what part of the country I lived in by my answers. The problem was they asked what language other than English or Spanish was I likely to hear while out shopping and they only gave four possible answers, none of which would be my answer since Sho-Ban is the most prevalent language around here other than English or Spanish.

I didn’t finish the quiz because if I couldn’t give an honest answer, they wouldn’t be able to predict where I lived.

Another one promised to predict how long my hair is by me checking off everything I have experienced due to the length of my hair. Their first three or four issues had to deal with hair conditioner, I don’t use hair conditioner. Then there’s the one with hair getting caught in zippers. I don’t have anything that zips in the back, haven’t done for decades, so I don’t recall having problems with that.

So, yeah, the results were not accurate.

Additionally, they didn’t have anything about being too tired, sore, or late to bother with anything other than a ponytail because the person was unwilling to go outside without their hair up. Or one about dealing with massive tangles if they left their hair down for more than an hour.

I admit they did have one about the partner laying or sitting on their hair. Believe me, I’ve had that happen. In fact, at one point I cut my hair off because of it. You can ask my cousin who does my hair. She asked me three or four times if, I was sure. I was sure because I was tired of waking up Tom so I could go to the bathroom.

Needless to say, I have since grown it out again, but I no longer have to worry about anyone laying on top of my hair in the middle of the night.

I do have a niece with hair longer than mine, and I once told Konnie, her mother, that she was going to have issues with those masses once she had a husband.

Then again, I pointed out to Konnie that her eldest marrying someone so much taller than her was going to have some issues in the bedroom that Konnie wouldn’t understand as she didn't marry a tall guy.

We had a long talk about that.

Actually, that was when the long hair was discussed, but Konnie knew that one already, her hair is on the long side too. Though Konnie hadn’t known why I insisted on getting my hair chopped off or why I subsequently started growing it out again until we discussed it.

But a really huge height difference and or long hair does affect the dynamics of a relationship. Something I find some romance writers don’t mention in their novels.

I’ve read novels where there is a huge height difference, but the author doesn’t mention them having any issues standing face-to-face and kissing. Let me clue you in folks, if there is at least a foot difference in height, the shorter one is looking at the taller one’s chest, meaning adjustments have to be made for both parties for them to be able to kiss.

If they are sitting there isn’t as much of an issue because the shorter one could just sit on the taller one’s lap.

But really, it isn’t an issue of him just bending over, because the reality is she had to stand on tiptoe and him bend over, which isn’t a problem if they are close to the same height, but I swear most romance authors write kissing scenes as if they are close to the same height even if by their descriptions they are not.

People really need to pay attention to those details.

Of course, I’ve also read one romantic suspense where the author insists that the female lead was wearing clear lenses to hide her eyes from the viewer. I mean this, the author described the glasses as being oversized frames with clear lenses and still insisted they hid her eyes.

Yeah, I don’t think so. Tinted lenses would, but not clear. And it’s a good story, other than that glaring error. Drove me nuts because it drew me right out of the story every time.

But then so does the height difference issue.

There is a reason why we’re told to write what we know; it's more believable. But you don’t have to live it, just research it. Get accurate details.

Anyway, happy writing everyone!

Of Bad Years and Rough Times by Konnie Enos

 

It’s official. The 2020s have been beating my family up.

Okay, so maybe this started in 2019 because it was October of 2019 when our air conditioner went out and required major repairs and or replacement. Since we were broke, this necessitated acquiring another debt. But that just seems to be the tip of the iceberg. Since then, about a year later, we had to replace our dryer. Then in December of 2021 both our washer and one of our toilets needed to be replaced. Then in November of 2022, our heater died, caput, no repairs possible, it is down for the count. Our only option is to replace it and central heating systems aren’t cheap. We are making do with space heaters. And somewhere in this time frame, our water heater and microwave needed to be replaced too.

By my count, only the fridge and stove have not died or needed major repairs in the three years. Also, we have only had to replace one toilet and none of our sinks. Though we have discovered why we haven’t been able to use the tub in our hall bathroom. Guess what? Major repairs, and probably replacing the tub too. Yeah, we don’t have the money for that.

Now, what about our car? Yes, that too. We’ve had four separate incidents in the last three years of major repair bills. All just to keep the thing drivable as our only car.

Then there was the incident in July of 2021 when our internet went down and we could not get our provider to come out and fix it. I mean they said they would. They even scheduled it but never showed. With three people in the house doing college courses online, we couldn’t wait forever and Cox was much more responsive. Not to mention less the half the cost for better internet. So maybe that one was a good thing.

Health-wise we can start with COVID, which had me in the hospital twice and in isolation for most of both June and July back in 2020. Then replacing the toilet in 2021 coincided with Jerry having major surgery. Then after he’d recovered from that, he ended up in the hospital again because of an infection. I also spent most of 2020 with blurry vision and ended up having to have cataract surgery on both eyes. Then there is Melinda being sick from costochondritis at the same time Royce banged up his knee. Or me ending up in boot because I’d done something to my foot. Then there was Tony breaking his hand from hitting a wall and being off work completely until he was cleared by a doctor, at least for six weeks. Or the fact that Royce is currently off work because of a banged-up knee, again.

And that’s more than plenty for just three years but it doesn’t end there.

There have been several deaths among our family members too. My dad’s older brother, a favorite uncle of mine, Uncle Rodney, died days before his 83^rd birthday, in 2021. I was later told it was from COVID at the same time I was told about my other favorite uncle, my mom’s youngest brother, Uncle Royce, and his wife Aunt Rita, both passed on the same day, also in 2021, and also from COVID. Then the oldest of my brothers, Bryon, passed nearly a year after Uncle Rodney. No, Bryon didn’t have COVID, but his health had been declining for nearly a decade. Still, that’s four loved ones within one year.

But it doesn’t end there. Melinda lost a beloved, though older pet in 2020, and Tony lost a puppy in 2021 and a guinea pig in 2022. But I think the biggest blow was this month. Specifically the 15^th and 16^th.

In my last post, I mentioned our dog, affectionately known as Fluffball, was ill and we were treating it. I also mentioned that my husband was focusing on the worst-case scenario. Unfortunately, he was right. Our beloved Fluffball, Reeses, passed over the Rainbow Bridge on Sunday the 15^th.

However, during the week he was so sick Melinda noticed her cat, Tiger, was not feeling well. She watched him carefully and finally took him in on Monday morning. Within hours they told her that he would not survive the night because he was in severe Congestive Heart Failure. So he too passed over the Rainbow Bridge, on Monday the 16^th. We had so little time to absorb that he was even sick that his passing floored us. Tears are always near the surface as we attempt to return to some normalcy.

Reeses, our Fluffball, and our dear tabby, Tiger, are sorely missed.

Please send prayers and smiles to my family. We could use them.

I’m going to go wipe my eyes now.

Lack of Focus And Pets

 

Sometimes getting my mind to focus on what I need to be doing, instead of what I want to be doing is dang hard.

Like last night, I needed to fix my lunch for today and work on this post, what I did do is continue rereading an older version of one of my manuscripts. I really want to get that one in working order.

Then again, I have several I want to get in working order and finish! Just not getting far. Maybe I could use some brainstorming, but the thing is, Konnie has been trying to finish one of her manuscripts and has been asking me for brainstorming time. She contacted me when I was at work yesterday asking for just that and I told her, “Not today, I get off at 5 and I still need to write my post.”

I really wanted to get to bed on time, but when I opened my computer, I still had my manuscript open which I read until bedtime Monday night, and I started reading again. For some reason, I thought I was near the end of what I’d written, without checking how many pages I have left to read.

Big mistake. I am a slow reader.

So, it was past bedtime when I closed all that out and started trying to write my post.

And that’s starting to sound a lot like Konnie, who often stays up to the wee hours of the morning writing, but Konnie has to write at night! There are far too many people and pets to interrupt her if she tried writing during the day.

I have visited her place, and I can not write while I’m there. There’s too much going on, too many people, and too many dogs. The dogs bark a lot, and they are loud.

The thing is Konnie has visited my place, and she had trouble writing at my home. Why?

Because it was too quiet!

The person who hardly ever watches TV put a video in, just for the noise, so she could write.

Okay, yeah, sometimes I turn on the TV just for the noise, but never when I’m writing!

I should also point out that when Konnie visited me, her phone was going off rather regularly, as in several times a day, and at least once, several times in a matter of minutes. When I visited her, she was interrupted way more often than that by her family, so they were clearly holding back.

I obviously, don’t have that issue.

I rarely get calls and it's even rarer when I’m with Konnie since some of the calls I do get come from her. And when I’m visiting Konnie, my sister-in-law isn’t calling me for rides or to come to dinner, because I’m too far away for that. And it’s not like she calls me that much anyhow. Two or three times a week at most, just not when I’m in Vegas.

I can go whole days without my phone ringing and when I’m visiting Konnie, I generally don’t get any calls. Konnie’s phone doesn’t ring almost non-stop when she’s home, but it certainly rings a few times a day.

Then again, Konnie is the mother of five and her husband is still alive add in all those pets, and she’s way busier than I am.

I live with Patches and only Patches. And he can’t call me at work or ever. Plus, my sister-in-law tries very hard not to call me at work.

Konnie works at home.

Then again, if I worked at home, I’d still not be getting interrupted too much. Though sometimes Patches does try to walk on my keyboard. At least it's not every time I’m on my computer, just when he wants attention from me. He is a cat after all.

Konnie has more than one dog near her most of the time she’s trying to write. And by near, I mean on the bed up against her, near her.

Patches is on my bed right now, at the moment, but he isn’t sleeping, so who knows how long that will last, and he isn’t cuddled against me. He is in fact at the foot of the bed, right where I can barely reach him if I was laying down, which I clearly am not.

And speaking of pets, I want to express my condolences to Konnie and her family, this last week they lost two of their fur babies. Tiger and Reeses will be sorely missed. Though I’m not going to miss one less dog barking when I call. I am going to miss Konnie’s consternation when Tiger will go to me but not her.

Cats are funny that way sometimes. 😊

Anyway, happy writing everyone.

Of Disruptions and Distractions by Konnie Enos

 It is now Wednesday morning and I not only haven’t written a word for my blog post, but I haven’t gotten a clue what to write about. I’m sure it’s because I’ve been completely distracted by, well, my life. I think the last several months have been one disaster or distressing experience after another.

When our heating system died as a family we figured we had a chance to fix it IF my sons, who both had jobs at the time, could contribute a significant amount of money toward the cause. On paper, it looked doable.

Until one kept having to take unpaid leave because he kept getting sick (and passing it to me, by the way). Meanwhile, the other son was working massive overtime at first but moved to a different position and somehow wasn’t even doing 40 hours a week anymore. Thus making it difficult to cover his own bills. Plus the new position came with some stressors, in the form of other employees, that he hadn’t anticipated. Then the company started doing things that caused at least half their staff to jump ship, my son included. (Don’t ask me the name of the company because I never quite figured it out.)

And if that wasn’t bad enough we’ve been racking up vet bills. Nothing new with Mabel, but we’ve had to take Fluffball to the vet a couple of times in the last month or so. Both required several medications. This last time the vet said it was most likely this one simple thing we could treat with medications but they are running lab work to be sure. In the meantime, we’re treating the simple issue hoping it helps.

The issue is pessimist Jerry was in the room when the vet detailed the other issues it could be. So now he’s thinking we’re going to lose Fluffball sooner rather than later and behaving accordingly, which is driving the kids, and me nuts.

All of this leads to the kids, especially Royce, but also Melinda, having confrontations with Jerry because he’s driving them up the wall. Royce has come to me at least four times in the last three days telling me to make Jerry back off.

The problem is I think Jerry likes annoying people. Case in point, Jerry was given a useless box for Christmas. Jerry takes great delight in repeatedly flipping the switch.

For any that don’t know, a useless box is one set up with a switch to activate it, but the action it causes is for the mechanism in the box to immediately shut it off. And while it is not super noisy, it does make some noise when it is in action. Once no big deal. Ten times in immediate secession is going toward the annoying side.

 But even with all this going on, I’ve repeatedly attempted to generate any ideas for writing, be it a story or my post, and whenever I do sit down with my computer not one idea flows. I stopped working on one story because I know it needs help but I can’t figure out what to change to fix it. Then there is one story that I had thought was looking good but got some honest critiques and realized I’m far from having a compelling story. But fixing it just brought up new problems with no ideas on how to fix them. And they are not the only stories that I’m stalemated on.

Then yesterday, knowing my post was due, I tried for several hours to germinate just one idea. Nothing.

It was the middle of the night before I gave up and got some sleep hoping rest would help me. Not so much. Still no idea.

When that happens my next best course of action is to just write. Stream of thought. In the past, I’ve managed to hit upon an idea that actually worked to stimulate a workable idea. A few times it didn’t.

This is clearly one of them.

And, of course, any attempts to write when other family members are up means disruptions. This is probably why writers tend to do so at night or at least when the fewest people are around to be an issue.

Lucky me, not only are other people home 24/7 but someone is always up 24 hours a day thanks to my sons who are clear night owls. Of course, when they think I’m sleeping they leave me alone, but it’s hard to convince them I’m asleep when my bedroom door is open and they can see the light even if it is just from my screen.

So that is my life, writing life, right now. And I was hoping 2023 would be better.

Smile. Make the day a brighter day.