Names

I quite recently read several things about names. I have to tell you, I’ve had some people tell me I’m too touchy on this topic.

I once asked someone how to spell the name of a relative, I was told, “it’s just a name, sound it out.”

I’m sorry, it’s not “just a name”, it is that person’s moniker. It is part of who that person is. I might be more of a stickler than most about how my name is spelled, but I have reason to be.

One of my earliest school memories evolves a teacher telling me, several times I was spelling my name wrong, which I repeatedly refuted. She finally looked at me quite sternly and said, “You’re Bryon’s sister aren’t you?”

I’d like to point out that is exactly how my brother spells Brian. So yes, both of us have common names spelled exceptionally.

The teacher decided to let me spell Connie, with a K. Then she turned to Bonnie and asked, “How do you spell your name?”

Of course we thought she was crazy. How else are you going to spell Bonnie?

Mind you, we were five at the time.

In high school I had an experience where someone needed to write my name down and didn’t bother to ask me how to spell my rather common sounding first or middle name, but then did ask how to spell my last name.

I’d like to point out that our maiden name was a combination of two simple four letter words. I replied. “Just like it sounds,” I repeated it for emphasis. “You spelled the rest of it wrong.”

I then had to explain how she misspelled my first and middle names. She also had to write down my brother’s and Bonnie’s names, leaving her to believe our whole family had weirdly spelled names. (Only Bryon’s first name and Bonnie’s middle name, and no, just us three, in our whole family.)

Now, as an older woman, and aspiring author, I’d seriously looked at the notion of a pen name, but was told in a nutshell, why monkey with something as memorable as what I already have.

As a young adult, a group I belonged to made a phone list that listed everyone’s name with their nickname. Each listing read: first name “nickname” last name. Mine read: Konnie “Konnie with a K” then my last name. Even after I moved out my Dad got phone calls asking for “Konnie with a K”.

I also have another reason to stress how my name is spelled. “C” Connie Enos, is the wife of my husband’s younger brother. I tell people if they spell my name incorrectly they have my kids’ aunt, not me.

But as I think about how names are spelled, I wonder about how our characters feel about it. How my name is spelled is part of who I am. I find it rude to misspell it, when it’s intentional or done repeatedly. I do understand mistakes. But as strongly as I feel about my name, I’ve never written a character with the same intense feelings nor have I had any problems with changing a character’s name as a story progressed. Then again, I’ve never written a story with a character who had a name that was unusual or spelled in a surprising way.

What do you think about names, and how they affect characters attitudes?

Smile. Make the day a brighter day.

Brainstorming and life

Dang! It's Wednesday morning again, and I’m again caught without a post. And I’d like to blame my busy life, but the fact is the last couple of days I have been mulling over a problem I’m having with my WIP, and not getting very far writing wise.

I also totally forgot until this morning that it was my turn to post.

Have you ever had days like that? One where you wake up and realize you’ve completely forgotten something you needed to do?

I thought it was bad the time I woke one morning and realized that my sister-in-law had an appointment the day before, and we’d both spaced it. (Here’s hoping that doesn’t happen again.)

But this time I spaced it because I was staring at the screen trying to figure out how to fix a problem in my manuscript before it came up. Yes, I said before. The other day I realized if my heroine resorts to the tactics I was planning for her to use “to get the hero’s attention,” he was going to blow his top. So far, I’d been thinking of my heroine’s future actions while totally forgetting the hero’s backstory. Not good.

But this wasn’t changing what I already had written to fit the story it was reworking how I moved forward, to fit the story.

And while I did that, everything else went by the wayside, chores, errands, and my blog post. :)

So, how many of you sometimes spend way too much time cogitating on scenarios for your stories and forgetting about all the other things, you need to be doing?

Happy writing everyone!

The Voices We Hear

Recently I was typing along and as I did things popped into my story which I hadn’t anticipated, leaving me looking at my characters and thinking, “you could have told me”. Not once, but twice.

Then another character, which isn’t even one of my main characters (i.e.: she isn’t a POV character) actually got in an argument with me about a scene I had to write for her. I couldn’t fathom why I had to write it nor was I about to make my monster even bigger by adding one more POV.

She is, however, one smart cookie, and made her point. I did need what turned out to be three scenes, which I was able to write from the viewpoint of two of my main characters who she interacted with.

On an even more recent occasion, I asked Bonnie if she was writing and she said in a nutshell, “no, I’m mulling over stuff that doesn’t come up yet in my story”.

I told her to get her characters talking about what she was still writing.

She said it was actually a secondary character who wanted his story told, something that would be part of the next book. After she explained in full what the problem was I offered my solution. Write a scene for the guy and see if it appeased him.

Then just the other day my girls and I were in the kitchen talking, I could not tell you what brought it up, but at some point we were talking about people’s behavior and we decided that my youngest daughter had characteristics like one of the twins in my opus while my oldest son had those of his twin brother.

As I was thinking of all of these real conversations, I often wonder what non-writers think about us writers.  It is somewhat hilarious when my girls and I will get to talking about our stories and the people in them and my poor husband will come into the conversation totally thinking we’re talking about real people and wondering where we met them.

“Who exactly is Harry, and what did he do?”

(Just an example. Any character names could be substituted.)

My point being, writers talk about characters like they are real people, because to us they are. They tell us their stories and ask us to write them. Most of the time they let us know what is coming up in their story before we get it down on paper, or screen. We even have arguments with them.

When those characters won’t talk to us, we stare a blank screen and wonder what to do to get them talking again, or try to find another character who will tell their story. That’s why writer’s, like Bonnie, with ADD, have several books going at one time. If one character won’t talk, then fine, I’ll talk to this one over here.

I personally do have several stories I could work on, however my opus has seven POV characters and more supporting characters than I care to count, making a number of stories in one. So while I may only being working on one book, I’ve got several characters talking to me.

Then there are the other books whose characters are quietly waiting in the background for their turn. I’m also sure as soon as I’m finished with one, another one will come along. There is always going to be another story to tell. Remember that, the next time you stare a blank page or screen, and no characters are talking to you.

Smile. Make the day a brighter day.

As The World Turns

Living alone it’s easy to form a habit of writing every day, there is little to distract or pull you away from the goal, but the problem with that is if you get caught up in the writing you are doing and put off all the other chores that need done.

Dishes, and laundry, still need washed. Floors need swept, or vacuumed, or mopped, and bills need paid, checkbooks need balanced; the world doesn’t stop moving while we’re concentrating on our fictitious worlds and sometimes that catches up to us, sometimes in heart stopping ways.

The other day I got a call from sister-in-law, her asking or a ride to do some errands was no big deal, I do that all the time, but I about had a heart attack when she said, “Today after my appointment.”

Today! I instantly racked my brain, positive I’d looked on my calendar that morning to be certain when her next doctor’s appointment was, and I was sure it wasn’t until the following day. So I was reaching for my planner as I asked her if she’d read her calendar correctly pointing out what day of the week it was.

She groaned, “It’s tomorrow isn’t it?”

Her calling for a ride was one thing. She doesn’t drive, I chauffeur her around all the time, but her mentioning an appointment I didn’t have on my calendar? That’s a whole other problem, and the fact is, I’ve spaced her appointments before. That’s why I’d specifically checked my calendar, I knew one was coming up, wasn’t sure when.

But such is the life of a writer. She needed a ride to run errands, I thought it would be easier to do them on separate days, so I took that day to run her errands, the next day was her appointment then I woke up this morning and moaned. Today is Wednesday!

Yeah, sometimes life just gets away from us. J

Happy writing everyone!

Racism Part 2

Back in May I posted my thoughts on racism but recently I saw this post on Facebook:                             I’m proud to be black; said a black man.

            I’m proud to be Asian; said an Asian man.

            I’m proud to be white; said a racist.

I read this and I thought really? How racist can this world get? I will repeat what I said then, judging a person as racist simply because they lack pigmentation is racist.

Honestly, what is wrong with a person being proud of who they are as an individual, no matter how much pigmentation they may or may not have? Being proud of who you are does not mean you think of yourself as superior, it just means you’re not ashamed of who you are, and there is nothing wrong with that.

Really read that statement above. If it’s okay for the black and Asian man to be proud of who they are, why can’t the white man be proud? Can’t people see how blatantly racist it is to say this behavior is fine for this group of people, but this group can’t do it because they lack enough pigmentation?

Why can’t we all be equally proud of who we are as individuals and show respect for everyone else? When are we going to stop judging people by their appearance and start realizing who they are by their actions?

Remember actions speak louder than words.

In the biblical story of the Good Samaritan it wasn’t the Jewish ecclesiastical leaders who stopped and helped that battered and beaten Jew, but the Samaritan. This was a man despised by the Jews, and he went above and beyond the call, not only getting him aid, but taking him to shelter, caring for him and paying to insure his care continued.

It doesn’t matter what races you put in this story. It’s about one man helping another. The Samaritan didn’t think about the differences in their religion, race or anything else, he simply saw another HUMAN BEING needing help.

We need to stop defining how good or bad someone is by the amount of pigmentation they might have, or where they might have been born, or what religion they might practice and start realizing we’re all HUMAN BEINGS. Our differences don’t need to make us enemies.

I’ve also said before, no two people are exactly alike. I’m telling you now that this world would be a rather boring place if we were.

So come on world, let’s stop reviling people for our differences and start respecting them. Our differences make this world run.

Not everyone has the skills, intelligence and knowledge to lead nations.

Not everyone has the talent to entertain us with laughter and music.

Not everyone can sooth a troubled heart.

Not everyone has the patience to teach a small child how to tie his shoe.

Not everyone knows how to knit, or sew, or cook, or write, or sing or dance. Name your talents here. Not everyone can do it. All of us must work together to see that everything runs smoothly.

But most of all, let’s stop assuming that because someone with little or no pigmentation is proud of the individual they are, that they are racist. I rather like myself but I don’t think of myself as better than anyone else so I can’t be racist and I don’t want to be judged as such simply because of my clear lack of pigmentation.

Please think, don’t judge.

Smile. Make the day a brighter day.

Birthdays and Holidays part 2

As I stated in my last blog post, Konnie and I were born on July 5^th, a fact that does affect how we think and feel, but there are lots of other people born on or near holidays. I know quite a few.

And I’ve heard a lot stories, and or complaints about this fact of life, everything from never having friends in town, or available, on their birthday because of the holiday or one girl who griped that everyone always expected any party held on her birthday to be a costume party. These things exist, and, when possible, we should incorporate them into our stories.

After all, for our characters to be realistic, they have to have a birthday, don’t they?

I admit, sometimes the timeline of a story doesn’t lend itself to including a birthday. If it doesn’t span an entire year, it might not cover the time when the birthday is. And there are people who just don’t make a great deal out of birthdays, but what if they do, or what if the character was born on or near a holiday?

Or what if, like that bit I witnessed on The Big Bang not too long ago, a character would rather ignore his birthday for some reason. What is the reason? And how do his friends respond to it? If the writers of The Big Bang can make entire episode based on that subject, it should make a good brief story line too.

Or you could have a character born near a holiday that isn’t on the same date every year, and in the story, that date happens to be your character’s birthday. How will they react? How will they feel?

I can help you with a family’s reaction to having to deal with a birthday and Thanksgiving on the same day. I could even ask my brother how he felt. And I already know Mom’s reaction to going into labor just as soon as she finished eating that yearly feast. She never let us, or more particularly Ben, forget it.

And in my late teens when my youngest brother made his entrance into the world, I heard a lot of jokes about being in labor on Labor Day, not sure if he still hears them, but then how many of his friends know he was actually born on that very day? Though it might be fun to have character give birth on that day. :)

And that complaint about friends being unavailable for birthday parties? Well, I recall once commiserating with a couple of friends over that shared problem. They were born on July  4^th, but I’ve later heard it from a friend born on Christmas day.

I personally know of three people born on Christmas day. (I feel sorry for those poor souls. Gifts only once a year? How awful! :))

I already mentioned the Halloween birthday complaint. I can see how that would affect the attitude of someone about birthdays. But it might actually be fun to add to a story. :)

And I know a lady was born on New Year’s Day, however, I think she enjoyed being able to have a sleepover the night before her birthday. At least she was having fun at the one such sleepover I attended.

And there is one day on the calendar, which isn’t really a holiday, but it does affect the people born on that day a great deal. I happen to know of several. And that’s February 29^th. Just two of these souls that I know of are a cousin and one of my teachers both in high school and later in college.

As I recall my cousin complained about having a birthday party just once every four years, but I think that might have been his mother’s doing, we didn’t get a party every year either. But our one time teacher liked to joke he was younger than his students were. He insisted he was only twelve when he was teaching us back in high school but had celebrated a birthday by the time he moved up to teaching college, so he was thirteen then. And he milked that both times. He was a fun teacher, one of my very favorites.

Anyway, when we were born can affect our attitudes about birthdays, and when our characters are born might do the same for them. Do any of your characters have a birthday on or near a major holiday? And how does it affect your story?

Happy writing, everyone. :)

Introverts and Other Shy People

I’ve read a lot lately about being introverts and how it affects a person’s life, namely needing time alone to recharge. But the other day I saw this title: “Leave me alone, but I also want to be included”, and it instantly reminded me of something that happened to me.

I was finally getting over a cold, no longer contagious, but couldn’t go more than a few hours without a nebulizing treatment. There was a family activity at church, involving board games. All my kids wanted to go and my husband talked me into it, after all, churches have electricity and my nebulizer was portable.

Once there, I sat, near an outlet. I thought it was a good spot, near the door, where everyone coming in would see me and with several fun games in front of me, I figured someone would join me as soon as things got started.

It was held in a large gym and I knew it would be difficult to hear my quiet voice if everyone was socializing. Also, as shy as I am, starting any conversations was out of the question. Besides, I couldn’t wander around because of my asthma and my bad back, aggravated by my excess weight.

Then people started coming in and mingling.

I’m not saying no one talked to me. Several people said hi as they brushed past me, but that was about the extent of it. Not one person sat down and offered to play even one game, except my own family.

For nearly an hour.

Not even the friendliest people there.

After being pretty much ignored by everyone else, I asked my husband to take me home.

Anyway, I thought of all of this and wondered how often we as writers think about why a character sits quietly in a corner.

Are they shy or an introvert? Or is it health reasons? Or, like me, a combination of all three.

Do we consider how these people feel about being left by themselves? Do the others around them even notice that they are there or when they leave?

I once had a lady enthusiastically tell me about a recent party, and something funny that happened at it, saying I’d missed the fun and I should make the next one.

All well and good, except I’d been beside her when the funny event occurred. Yeah, I walked out early, because no one was talking to me anyway, but I’d still been there.

Do you have characters who experience that?

When Bonnie needs to write the shy characters she comes to me precisely because I understand them so well.

Now the outgoing, extroverts, I have to ask Bonnie though I suppose I could ask my oldest daughter. She gets that sort too.

Smile. Make the day a brighter day.