Of Busy Days and Laughs by Konnie Enos

 I normally wake up somewhere between six and seven in the morning, though most mornings I tend to lounge in bed for a while after I wake up, usually doing something on my tablet or Kindle. Yesterday I got right up. Still a bit sleepy, I was in the shower within 15 minutes.

When I entered the bathroom, I, of course, shut the door. But this did not stop my husband from entering the bathroom. For whatever reason when he left, he didn’t close the door while I was still in the tub and just barely starting to dry off.

Melinda came in ranting about a problem we had not once batting an eye about my current condition. The only acknowledgment of my being in the tub was asking if I had an appointment, which was obvious because I was getting out of the tub.

“Yes, one this morning and one this afternoon.”

She then asked, “And why is the door open when you’re still getting out of the shower?”

“I don’t know. Ask your dad. I shut it.” She promptly left, shutting the door, and I don’t think she ever asked Jerry about it.

I get back to my bedroom and bed where I immediately set to work finding out where it was that I had to go so I knew about how much travel time I had to plan on.

While I’m still trying to find the location Melinda comes back and asks when I’m leaving.

“I’m still trying to figure out where it is.”

I eventually found the information I needed and had barely managed to calculate the necessary travel time when she returned. “Well, are you going to help?”

“I have to leave within the hour.” I’m not dressed to go yet.

She was not happy but left the room. Then, not long before I left she came back and asked me what chores I could do.

“I don’t know. I have two appointments and don’t know how long either of them will be, so probably not until after I get back from the second one.”

She’s still not happy but says, “So dinner then.” Then storms back out of my room though I assume that means I’m making dinner.

I left for my appointment. I made it with a bit of spare time but it took long enough that when we got home I had just enough time to set up my work computer and check my emails for work. Then I had to go to my second appointment. This one was to renew my military ID so Jerry had to be there because he’s the veteran.

At one point the lady helping me asked Jerry to name his dependents. He said just me.

She asked for clarification.

Jerry and I then discussed which of our kids were still getting VA benefits, which is just Tony. In the processes we named most of them, which satisfied her. I think she was only verifying she had the correct account and that Jerry was who he said he was.

Well after the fact, after dinner, I realized she wouldn’t know who had VA benefits because she was with the military. She wanted to know who had military ID, which currently only Tony and Royce do. So now I’m slightly obsessing over the fact that neither one of us caught on to the fact she was asking about military dependents. Not VA dependents. Or even kids living at home.

Oh, well. We were still able to confirm his identity and I renewed my ID.

While we were driving to this appointment, I got two text messages about my job that I needed to respond to. One of which stated I had two emails requiring my immediate attention. So the minute I got home, the first thing I did was check my email where I find not two, but three work-related emails to respond to.

While I’m still doing that Royce comes in and asks if we can have pizza for dinner. As luck would have it, I had purchased some frozen pizzas so we could do just that without requiring Melinda to make pizzas from scratch. I said we could do that. So apparently I didn’t have to make supper after all.

While we are eating, Melinda turned to Royce and asked him to replace the fly strip in the kitchen before morning.

He looked up at the ceiling, sighed then said, “Okay.”

“You get all the high jobs because you’re the tallest one.”

Folks he stuck his tongue out at me!                      

Gave me a laugh at the end of a pretty busy day.

Smile. Make the day a brighter day.

Waiting and Machines by Bonnie Le Hamitlon

I don’t know how many of you know this, but I have had to use the electric carts provided at stores for years. I just can’t manage to do my shopping without them.

One time I went to WinCo for a quick trip. I wasn’t getting that much. Well, I do live alone unless you count Patches. At any rate, it was at the first of the month, and as I headed for a checkout line, the first few I passed already had four or five families with very full carts waiting.

Then I spotted a line with only one gentleman and he was unloading his cart.

I pulled in behind him.

He took one look at what few items I had and asked the cashier to not ring up his purchases yet, so I could go first.

This is about the time I realized he had not one, but two overly full carts, but also already had part of his selections already on the conveyor belt.

I told him not to bother. He got there first, and, “I don’t mind waiting if I don’t have to stand.”

And I don’t.

As long as I don’t have to stand on my flat feet while in line, I don’t mind waiting.

Of course, I could have also pointed out that the other lines at that time had longer waits, I suspect because everyone was avoiding getting in line behind him.

At any rate, I waited.

When it came time for him to pay, he paid in cash. Which was something considering how much he had, but he also handed the cashier more than needed and pointed to my items as well.

I tried to protest, but he insisted I deserved it for waiting so patiently. The thing is, none of the other people I could have gotten in line behind were even to the conveyor belt yet.

I honestly had a shorter wait getting behind him with his two full carts than getting behind several families all with a full cart each.

He still paid for me. I did thank him, but I really didn’t mind waiting. 

I admit, had I been in a hurry, I might have, but as I rarely go to the store when I have somewhere I have to be by a certain time, I didn’t need to be watching the clock right then, and I noticed a few dad’s checking their watches as they stood in line.

I honestly try to do my shopping when it doesn’t matter how long it takes because you never know what will happen, or how long the lines are going to be.

Like the other day when I was at Walmart.

When I went to leave, I soon discovered that other than their self-checkout lines, they had a grand total of two lanes open, and neither line was going very fast.

At one point, someone got in line behind me and mentioned something about how they needed to open another line. I pointed out they were probably avoiding that to encourage the customers to use the self-checkout kiosks. And I may have been right, but it turned out the lady I was talking to couldn’t use the self-checkout because she was shopping for a nonprofit, her purchases were tax-exempt.

I personally, refuse to use the self-checkout mostly because I find them confusing, but well, every time I see them, I think back to the time when self-serve gas stations started being a thing.

Have you ever noticed that they don’t have self-serve in Oregon? And have you ever realized how nice it is that you don’t have to get out of your car to fill up in Oregon?

I love Idaho. I was born and raised here, but I sometimes miss being able to just sit in my car and someone else fill her up. It’s the only thing I really liked about Oregon.

And now I hear some fast-food places now have automated ordering kiosks. Yeah, I realize that using a machine instead of a person saves money for the company, but at what cost?

Then again, around here there are an abundance of sales clerk and waitressing jobs and very few people wanting to take them.

Too many people want higher-paying jobs and won’t accept what is available. And then there are all the benefits Biden is giving the unemployed. They have no incentive to take those low-paying jobs, not when they are getting more to stay home.

Does anybody see a problem with that?

I sure do.

When too many people won’t take on the menial jobs, soon those jobs won' exist anymore, they are slowly being replaced by machines. Think about that for a minute.

Anyway, happy writing everyone.

 

Of To-do Lists and Sleeping Muses by Konnie Enos

 

It’s Wednesday and my turn to post.

Problem.

Although I’ve been contemplating it since Sunday, I cannot come up with a single idea.

Currently, the most important thing on my list is writing this post. However, what I’m thinking about is the other things on my to-do list. Things that I absolutely can’t put off again or have to be done today. So my focus is on trying to figure out how to accomplish everything. Some of it I should have done yesterday but instead, I spent the day trying to come up with an idea for this post.

Most of the day I was scouring Facebook and websites looking for something to ignite an idea.

Not even a flash.

Next, I tried to going through my list of partially finished attempts at posts trying to see if I had enough of an idea to finish them. Which, of course, didn’t work. They are still unfinished and likely to remain so for the conceivable future.

Then I attempted to read through my past posts seeing if any of them sparked an idea. Ah, a flash, or two.

Nope. They didn’t formulate a complete idea.

After spending hours on that venture and having accomplished exactly nothing, I realize it’s the middle of the night and I’m going to have to get some sleep sometime.

As late as it was, my only coherent thought was that sleep sometimes produces ideas. It should at least energize me enough to get some ideas flowing. However, I wasn’t sure I’d wake up naturally with enough time to get my post written and online before it was due.

I don’t normally use an alarm because I generally wake up fairly early anyway. I don’t know if it’s because of the sunlight coming in my bedroom window or the fact other people (Melinda) are up and about, but the only time I sleep past seven is when I didn’t even go to bed until the early hours of the morning. (I have to read sometime.) So, wanting to make sure I was up with plenty of time to get this one task done, I set an alarm.

My last thought before I dosed off was hoping sleep would get my muse working and I’d wake up with more than a flash of an idea.

I did not.

My brain is still focused on everything I have to do.

I’m pretty sure I have at least one bill due tomorrow so I can’t put off dealing with that chore another day unless I want a late charge.

The dishes have been put off far too long and someone will have to get them done unless we want to continue washing what dishes we need every time we prepare something to eat.

But even before those tasks, I have a routine doctor’s appointment this morning. So as soon as I get something posted, I’m going to have to get breakfast, get bathed and dressed, and then hightail it clear across town to see my doctor. The tough part is it may take as much as an hour in traffic to get there. So I don’t have enough time between now and then to accomplish all of that, and it’s all vital.

So instead of focusing on writing, I’m trying to figure out how much time each task will take and when I have to get them completed so that I’m not late.

Then, of course, my stream of thought is interrupted because the pets need to be fed and Mabel is currently on daily medicine because of some health issue involving her liver. (It's antibiotics and they are doing their job. She’s already doing much better than she was. Now she has to finish the course.) So I have to stop typing long enough to make sure she takes her medicine.

Fortunately, she thinks Pill Pockets (what we use to get the dogs to eat their pills) are a treat and is always eager to gobble them up. So the most time-consuming part of the process is getting her medicine wrapped in one of the Pill Pockets.

Though I’m also interrupted by conversations with various family members about our washer springing a leak in the middle of the night.

I have not investigated this but Melinda did.

Not only did Tony stuff the machine, mostly with jeans and towels (i.e.: bulky stuff), but he didn’t take the setting off of delicate. We’re pretty sure it just didn’t spin out completely.

To test her theory she got Royce to put his load of wash in.

Yes, no leaks, and the washer seems to be working fine. Thankfully, because we cannot afford another issue.

So that is my stream of thought for the day.

Smile. Make the day a brighter day.

Humor and Me by Bonnie Le Hamilton

 

Growing up, I was the serious one. I was the one who rarely got a joke and sometimes it was difficult to get me to laugh. I’m not saying I didn’t laugh at times, but on the whole, I was more on the side of explaining why the joke didn’t make sense or that it couldn’t ever happen instead of laughing with everyone else. And I detest puns.

These days, if someone employs a pun in their joke, I just glare at them. They are never funny and are often, well, immature.

Additionally, I’m not one to tell jokes. Or at least, I haven’t been in the past.

As a teenager, I was the butt of my father’s jokes and teasing because I always took everything so literally. (Now I know that I am on the spectrum, but back then I had no idea.)

Now, I’ve actually cracked jokes several times!

My favorite one to crack involves me asking someone if they “mind” doing some specific favor for me and when they respond, as most people do in this situation, “Sure.”

I counter with a dismayed, “You mind!”

I do this because well since I was asking if they minded doing this small thing for me, the correct response would be, “No I don’t mind,” if you are willing to do it, Not, “Sure.”

Saying Sure is actually saying that you do mind doing it, that you are unwilling to assist or help.

I’ve actually done that three or four times in the last month, which is a lot more fun then flatly pointing out they responded incorrectly, which frankly I’d have never done anyway. It used to be that I ignored this particular mistake. It’s only been just lately that’s I’ve started with the wisecracking comeback.

Right now, I would love for someone to come up to me and ask if my if I drink because I’m prepared to respond, “I drink all the time! See I even have a bottle of water right here with me.”

And I would be correct.

“Drink” is a verb meaning to ingest fluids. So, all human beings drink, even newborn babies drink! After all breast milk or formula are both liquids.

Just because society has attached a negative connotation to the word doesn’t mean that is the only meaning of it!

So, yes, I do drink all the time. In fact, I just refilled my water bottle.

Though even with those wisecracks I still don’t laugh a lot, and I have a coworker who seems to think it is his duty to make me laugh at least once a day.

He’s not always successful.

However, he is also claiming one instance that was not his doing. I mean he was trying to get me to laugh (he had a couple of our coworkers in stitches) but I didn’t laugh until another worker made a crack about my glaring at his inane puns.

Okay, that was funny, but he didn’t make me laugh, she did.

The point is that I do have a sense of humor. A weird one, but it does exist.

Of course, part of the problem is that I do take things so literally, but I’m not so sure that is the whole problem, after all, pointing out that, “Sure,” isn’t exactly the correct response to, “Would you mind,” isn’t something someone with a low IQ would do. And, as my coworkers point out all the time, I’m very smart.

I don’t always feel smart, but well, I have had my IQ tested. So that is official.

Actually, recently I came across one of those online quizzes that professed no one could pass it if they didn’t have an IQ of 160 or higher. Now I know what my IQ is, and it isn’t that high, but out of curiosity, I took the quiz.

I aced it. This means either they were mistaken as to how hard it was, or I’m smarter than that official IQ test showed me to be.

The thing is I was shocked to learn how high my IQ was way back then because I’d once taken a quiz in the Reader’s Digest which they said if you got a certain number of questions right, you were smart enough to join Mensa. I missed it by one question.

The worst part was when I discovered the answer to one of the mathematical questions, I smacked myself in the head because I should have known that!

Yeah, not smart. Even without that, I have always considered myself of only average intelligence, mostly because of the grades I managed to achieve, let alone that I’m such a slow reader, which goes to show that grades and reading speed does not indicate intelligence. Remember that as you write.

Happy writing everyone!

Of Sleep and Time Crunches by Konnie Enos

 Today is the last day of this semester and I have two finals still to do, plus finish one last assignment.

I was working on said assignment when I realized I needed sleep. It was about midnight. Yes, that's pretty late to go to bed. However, for some unknown reason, I ended up awake a couple of hours later. Since I was up, I tried to finish my assignment.

This worked right up until Jerry told me our son wasn't getting up and therefore couldn't take him to his appointment. Fun.

I ended up driving him, which thankfully only entailed dropping him off. By the time I got home, I was dragging so I lay down to get some more sleep only to have my alarm go off because it's Wednesday morning.

I reset the alarm for an hour later and when it went off again I hit snooze. I wasn't even planning to get up until the dogs started barking and I realized they'd need to be fed plus Mabel needs her medicines. I got up to do that though I'm still asleep. 

I'd warned Bonnie that I might not be able to get to the post, due to homework and tests, but I hadn't heard from her so I have no clue if she has done a post or not. Nothing is scheduled yet, so now I'm attempting to type while fighting my eyes to stay open while I have one of those "you didn't get enough sleep" headaches. Yes, I get it. Three hours is not enough sleep.

Since I have to finish that assignment and do those finals today, I'm going to have to focus on getting more rest and getting those completed. Hopefully, next time I have to post I'll have time to write something.

Smile. Make the day a brighter day.

Twin Problems by Bonnie Le Hamilton

 

Several times in the last few weeks I’ve had occasion to pull up a picture on my phone that my nephew took of his mother and sent to me. On most of those occasions it went something like this:

I show the person I’m talking to the picture.

Them: That’s a nice picture of you.

Me: No, it isn’t.

Them: That’s a really nice picture!

Me: Yeah. But it’s not of me.

Them: Oh.

The only exception to this scenario is one woman who scanned the picture then faced me and said, “That’s not you, is it?”

“Good eye. It isn’t me.”

She confessed she didn’t think it was me because of the different glasses, but still, not many people noticed any differences between that picture and me. Confronted with the two of us together is another issue.

Sometimes I wonder how her family can tell us apart, but not even her husband never had any problems telling us apart.

The first time he set eyes on me, I was sitting on his couch in his apartment holding his then-infant eldest daughter in my arms, and he still knew I wasn’t his wife at first glance!

Nice.

Though I admit later visits with Konnie didn’t go so well. I can’t remember if it was May or Melinda, but prior to my visiting Konnie had warned me that this little darling only ever wanted her momma and would rarely even go to her father.

However, the second I walked into their apartment, she instantly reached for me. I gladly took her into my arms and hugged her. She was all fine and dandy with me holding her until she realized I didn’t have mother nature’s milk supply for her and she screamed bloody murder!

Another time, some years later, I’d just gotten off the phone from talking to Konnie when a few minutes before when my phone rang again. I answered and a small child happily said, “Hi, Mommy.”

Excuse me?

Talk about a heart-stopping moment!

Eventually, I got the kid to hang up and I called Konnie back.

Turns out, a certain little tyke had thought his mother had her cell phone on her while she was in the bathroom, and he’d also thought the last number dialed on their landline was that cell phone.

How wrong he was!

Again, he doesn’t make that mistake anymore. Though all of her family consider it weird when they enter a room while Konnie is talking to me with her speaker on. One time I heard Konnie giggle for no seeming reason then one of her kids said, “Oh, that’s Aunt Bonnie.”

It seems they had temporarily been nonplussed at hearing their mother’s voice coming from her phone.

I guess it was something like the time years ago when I’d been busy in the bathroom when my phone rang. I hurried to get it knowing as I did that it was Konnie. The answering machine, which was downstairs picked up first, but I got on the line upstairs and told her I was there. We talked for a while but I never went to the kitchen to erase our conversation from the answering machine.

Honestly hadn’t had time with all I was doing that day.

Anyway, when Tom got home from work, he noticed there was a message and, while wondering why there was a message when I’d been home all day, he played it.

Him: You talked to yourself on the phone?

His confusion was evident on his face, because after all, how could I manage that!

That memory is still as funny as the day it happened, but honestly, listening to that tape, the only way I could tell who was talking was by what was being said.

We’re identical after all. And our blind counselor in high school couldn’t tell us apart because our voices are so identical. Let alone that our own father could rarely manage to tell us apart until we managed to land such polar opposite husbands!

That’s not Konnie if she’s standing next to the tall one!

Though I admit, Dad had no trouble knowing it was me when I was entering the kitchen at a time when a meal didn’t need to be cooked or dishes didn’t need to be done, because at least once it was him who announced to the rest of the family, “Bonnie’s baking!”

Causing a stampeded to the kitchen while I’m still pulling the flour out!

And it's not like Konnie can’t bake. I have no idea why he could make that distinction, because, like I said, most of the time, he couldn’t tell the difference at all.

Such is life as identical twins. Just remember this the next time you have such characters in your WIP.

Happy writing, everyone!

Of Obstacles and Stress by Konnie Enos

These past two weeks have been interesting.

First, our internet went down. Our investigation of the cause told us we were the only house affected. (It appeared that the wires connecting our house to the provider were down.)

Cue calling to get repairs done because three of us had homework assignments due. That and what hot spots we have in the household could not handle the load necessary for even one college student.

After two days of less than a desirable response from our internet company, they have become our FORMER internet company. We know have their biggest competitor. Better customer service, much lower price, and faster speeds. Should have switched sooner.

Now the issue is our former company is refusing to cancel our still not repaired or otherwise working internet service. So I guess I’m reporting them to the Better Business Bureau. (Making it difficult/impossible to cancel service is illegal.) And I still have to get them to cancel.

New problem. After all this, I discovered I was out of one of my medicines. I have a mail-order pharmacy and I was sure I had ordered the refill. So I called.

Yes, I had ordered it but someone had incorrectly marked my last bottle as a 90 day supply (the amount I normally get) but for some reason for several months, they could only legally send me a 30 day supply. The lady I spoke to could correct the issue and get me some pills sent out ASAP, but that would still be about a week.

She kindly suggested talking to my doctor about getting an emergency supply.

Now next problem. My daughter had already been trying to get an appointment but always got their answering service and still has had no response. We assumed they’d taken a week off or something and by this time it was Friday afternoon, July 2. I was pretty sure they weren’t going to be in the office for a few more days. I’d have to wait.

What medicine am I out of?

My high blood pressure medicine.

Nobody in my family wants me to stress out trying to get our former internet provider to cancel out service while I don’t have my blood pressure under control. I haven’t even reported them to the proper authorities yet.

Then with all this going on, my kids have all expressed concern about my husband’s health and how it appears to be affecting his driving ability. None of us are suggesting he stop driving. We are suggesting he have a complete physical to see if they can determine the cause of this very recent issue.

But Jerry, being Jerry means he now refuses to do any chauffeuring. Now since Melinda has a license, this shouldn’t be an issue, but, as noted above, she has been trying to get ahold of our doctor because she has all the symptoms of her thyroid being low, again. So she hasn’t been driving for a couple of weeks due to an extreme lack of energy. That and taking multiple naps a day.

Okay, two down for the count. That leaves me as the designated driver. This meant I got to ignore my homework for four hours last Thursday so I could take Tony to his appointment, at the DMV.

(I took some reading with me so I wasn’t ignoring my homework.)

The good part is he finally passed his driver’s test and I’m no longer the designated driver.

He is, however, not sure about the situation because I’ve already taken full advantage of the opportunity.

Saturday, our normal day for our weekly shopping trip, Melinda was, as usual, exhausted. Jerry was, now par for the course, refusing to drive anywhere. (I didn’t want him doing the shopping anyway.) And I had a homework assignment due that was, well, raising my blood pressure. In the end, I finally turned it in with an obvious error because no amount of trying to find the answer helped fix the issue. But of course, when the store was opened, I was still struggling with it.

On Monday, because we’d not gotten a few things on Saturday (some of it intentional because if we’d gotten the ice cream on Saturday it’d have been gone by Monday, and I wanted ice cream to celebrate my birthday) neither Melinda nor I were up to a store run, so we sent Tony again.

He has yet to be forced to take any of his non-driving siblings to an appointment but that’s more because they haven’t had any since he got his license. He can see that one coming and is not happy.

So that’s how my last couple of weeks have gone.

How’s your life going?

Smile. Make the day a better day.