The Downside of being a Twin by Bonnie Le Hamilton

Not too long ago yet another person learned I’m a twin, and, well, when this occurs one of two things happens. Said person either ask me what’s it like to be a twin, or comments something on the line of wishing they were a twin.

Now, I’ve mentioned my comeback for people asking me what’s it like to be a twin, but now I’d like to address why people really don’t want to be a twin.

The number one reason you don’t want to be a twin because people who know one of you, think they know both of you. In other words, people think I’m exactly like Konnie in personality. (Anyone who knows both of us can tell you otherwise.)

 The number two reason is that some people think it’s okay to give twins a gift to share. If you think it’s easier for twins to share than you don’t know any twins. I think it’s harder, probably because we have to share so much, starting with our names, people mixed us up a lot, but some of them resorted to just calling us “Onnie” since that worked for both of us.

And frankly, giving us one gift shows you know as little about us as those who gave us identical gifts. As I recall one birthday we each received a mini china tea set, a set of a jump rope and some jacks, a pair of pants, a dress, and a badminton set.

Konnie kept both tea sets, I kept the jump ropes and jacks and lamented that the pants were a size too small, I also don’t recall ever wearing that dress, except that day. Konnie loved that dress, and didn’t care for the badminton set. We’re not the same people.

Number three is you have to share a birthday with someone else. And yeah I know, everyone can find someone out there with the same birthday, but I’m not talking about finding someone with the same birthday, I’m talking about having that someone in the same house as you. And, in my case, I’m sharing a birthday with someone who likes German Chocolate cake. Now don’t get me wrong, I love chocolate, I just for the most part don’t like nuts in my deserts, and I can’t stand coconut or cherries. In other words, I can’t stand German Chocolate cake. You want to give me a cake, don’t make it that. I prefer Apple Spice cake with cream cheese frosting, but I will settle for any cake with buttercream frosting.

The other problem being that Konnie is shy, and while she didn’t mind boys at our birthday parties up until we were eight, after that she lobbied for a slumber party, and, of course, no boys. However, most of my friends (and often my best friend) was of the male variety.

I finally got tired of the ban on boys and insisted we plan separate parties. We turned nineteen that year, and she had her slumber party as always, though I think now she’d change her mind about that, finally.

And, when it comes to writing, I wish authors would show this side of being a twin, because, they don’t. The only book I’ve read that shows the down side of being a twin is “Jacob Have I Loved” by Katherine Patterson.

Does anyone know of any others? And please don’t give me any titles of books about twins taking the place of their twin, or books were one twin is bad and the other good. I hate those.

Happy writing everyone.

Sleep Deprived Illusions by Konnie Enos

Have you ever been jarred awake by your alarm and were still so tired you couldn’t figure out why it was going off so early in the morning?

I kid you not, that’s what happened to me. I couldn’t figure out why it was going off, but for some reason checked the calendar feature. I peered at it a moment trying to decipher the significance of it. The date meant nothing. I looked at the day of the week. It finally hit me. Weekday. School. I have to wake boys up.

I woke up the youngest one, then crawled back into bed. Even though he sat up, I fully expected to have to repeat the process when my alarm went off again (I had put it on snooze). But a minute or so later I heard a child enter the bathroom.

Oh good, more sleep. It’ll be about half an hour before I have to wake his brother up.

Then about twenty or so minutes later I for some reason woke up enough to look toward the bathroom door, which I can see from my bed, and I thought it looked like it was slightly ajar, like we normally have it when no one is in there. I remembered my youngest daughter had be up when I went to get my son and now it looked, and sounded, like no one was in there. And I couldn’t remember the hearing the water run.

I checked the time and panicked as I ran back to their room thinking they’ll probably be late. Then I stop short when I see my youngest son’s bed empty.

I hurry back to the bathroom. Which is locked. I holler at him to hurry. He responds with splashing water and saying he is getting out.

I shake my still befuddled head and crawl back in bed until it’s time to wake the older boy. The younger boy exists the bathroom shortly before my alarm went off again. Time to wake the older boy. By the time I get into their room he’s back in bed. We’ve told him repeatedly not to do this, but there he is.

I tell both boys the time and to get up, again telling the younger one that he isn’t supposed to be back in bed. I go back to bed myself, cause I don’t have to be up yet but I happen to see a boy child, probably the older one, go into the bathroom a moment or two later so I assume they’re up and don’t worry about any ten minute wake up reminders.

Then my daughter tells me it’s nearly twenty after and both boys are still asleep. I tell her not to worry, I’d get them up. Then a moment or two later my alarm goes off again. This time telling me I do have to get up.

I go tell both boys the time and that they’d better be up dressed and ready to go when I come back out or I’d dump water on them then I go to my room. The older one said something and the younger one looked at me, so I know they heard me.  

After that we just basically loaded up and got out the door. Even made it to their class early, which was a bit of a miracle.

Actually, the only things unusual about this morning were my two befuddled moments and the fact I never once had to fight my boys (specifically the younger one) or get a pitcher of cold water.

Oh the joys of motherhood (especially when you have teenage boy who have to get up before the crack of dawn).

Smile. Make the day a brighter day.

Writer's Block Part 2 by Bonnie Le Hamilton

Don’t you hate it when you look at a blank page, and draw a blank? I particularly hate it when I have lots of ideas, right up until I open Word. For the last week or so, since I’ve recovered from my concussion, I’ve  been trying to get back into writing, but all I’ve done is open up one file after and reread it, then when I get to the end of what I have, I draw a complete blank.

Blank pages are never fun to stare at, and I honestly don’t do it very long. Generally, if something doesn’t come to me in a couple of minutes, I switch to doing something else. And I’m beginning to wonder if I really should set a timer and write whatever comes to my mind. I used to do that in high school. Of course, that was in my creative writing class. While I’ve sort of tried that exercise outside of class, I’ve never set a timer to do it.

At any rate, I’m now thinking I should start doing that again, or maybe forget writing for a little longer and go read a book. Sometimes that will stimulate ideas too, except I do have ideas, I just freeze looking at a blank page, so maybe that won’t help.

Other things I know will work is taking a long walk, but I’m not about to do that for several reasons, not the least of which is that it’s sixteen degrees out.

Does anyone have any other suggestions to help relieve writer’s block? Clearly, both Konnie and I need it.

Happy writing everyone! J

Writer’s Block by Konnie Enos

For the last week I’ve known I had to do the post today so I’ve been attempting to come up with a topic while running people hither and thither and otherwise trying to keep my household running.

Yeah, even staring at a blank page didn’t germinate any ideas.

Then this morning, when I was already out of time, driving home from dropping my boys off at school, knowing full well that both my husband and youngest daughter had things to do within the hour so I would not have time to write anything, and idea came to me.

Writer’s block.

That’s what I’m dealing with.

How do you come up with ideas to write when your life is so hectic you don’t have time to think? How do you have time to write when you spend all your daytime hours running people hither and thither or balancing checkbooks or running errands or doling out meds to family members?

And maybe that’s why I can’t come up with a germ of an idea.

I’m so busy I have no time to think.

Right now I have maybe ten more minutes to write before I have to start running people places and I still need to get breakfast. (I’ve been up for hours already.)

Anyway, I racked my brain for days and still came up with a blank page until I decided to write about writer’s block.

And now I’m out of time.

Doctor’s appointments need to be gotten too. Family members have important things to get done that require my assistance, like driving them somewhere. A few bills need dealt with. Finances need done, as always. And sleep might be nice, but I doubt I’ll get any. Too much needs done.

Anybody else have days like this?

Smile. Make the day a brighter day.

Hoping For a Happy New Year Part 2 by Bonnie Le Hamilton

As Konnie stated last week, 2016 was not a good year for me. And about the only good thing, which has happened so far this year is my concussion healed, and I’m finally able to do things like read and write, but nothing else seems to be going right.

I’m still having trouble walking, and my sister-in-law is in the hospital, plus, I now have LESS to live off of thanks to the increase in insurance premiums. Some pay raise, thanks a lot Obama.

Anyway, as much as I’ve been hoping for a happy new year, it’s not starting out that way. Of course, last year started out pretty good and didn’t take a turn for the worse until June when my father-in-law died. And a lot can happen in twelve months.

Actually, once upon a time, in a mere ten months, I went from not dating at all to engaged, which is probably why I’m not laughing a certain nephew of mine, who, despite the fact he doesn’t have a girlfriend at the moment, announced he planned to get engaged this year. No one knows what tomorrow will bring.

In fact, if I recall correctly, his mother wasn’t even looking for romance when she met his father! We really don’t know when luck or love will come our way all we can do is keep our heads up and keep on living.

Though it’s that unpredictability of life that makes things really interesting.

Happy writing everyone. J

Hoping for a Better New Year by Konnie Enos

With this year ending I’ve seen many posts on Facebook exclaiming how grateful the person is that it’s almost over. I’m getting the impression that it’s been a horrible year for a lot of people.

I think I’ve been lucky since my year has been rather normal for me, but I can’t say the same for the rest of my family. Several family members have had their computers die for some reason yet to be explained. Then there is all the health issues cropping up. One time, and only once, I had a car dump me in the middle of the road, though that car dumped my husband a couple of times. We’ve also lost pets unexpectedly in the last year.

However, all things considered, I think we’ve faired this year fairly well.

Now my sister is another story.

I don’t think the start of her year was too horrible, but since about June she has literally had one thing after another. From her father-in-law dying to her car being totaled (not her fault), and she’s either been sick or in pain, unable to walk since June. Right now, on top of all that, she also has a concussion (from the accident). If anyone needs 2016 to be over with, it’s her.

Though at the moment 2017 isn’t looking up for her.

Being on a fixed income she was hoping the promised pay increase would help her budget, as we were. Yeah, thanks so much for the 0,3% raise. Seriously! Less the half a percent of a raise! After three years without one. Most people on SSI are getting maybe a dollar raise.

That’s right. One dollar. Then they also increased the cost of insurance premiums which will totally wipe out that raise, and then some.

So not an auspicious start for 2017.

I’m hoping that 2017 will bring better things and for my sister her health will improve as she gets her life back together.

For everyone else out there that has had a lousy year, I can only wish you a better one this next year.

I for one have had my ups and downs, but that is what life is all about and I’m muddling through.

I still have my family around me and this house to live in. And it’s still teeming with animals. We’re actually doing okay.

Now if we can just figure out this computer issue so everyone has one again and we can all get the work done we need to without juggling computers, well that would be good.

What’s that old Disney song, at least a line of it? ‘Think happy thoughts, any happy little thought’s’. Maybe if we all think happy thoughts this next year will be better.

So think positive.

Smile. Make the day a brighter day.

Season’s Greetings by Konnie Enos

Due to the season the debate has raged on all over social media about season’s greetings.

Are you politically correct and wish everyone “Happy Holidays”?

Or do you settle with polite and say whichever greeting you are most comfortable with? I’m not sure how many holidays are between Halloween and New Year’s Day, but I know it’s a lot more than just Thanksgiving and Christmas.

I honestly don’t understand why there is such a debate about it.

If you are a good Christian, and truly follow Christ’s example, then you would accept everyone, no matter their religion. If you are a polite, caring, decent, human being, you’d do the same thing. I’m also sure most, if not all, religions have teachings about being polite to others.

So during this holiday season when so many of us are celebrating one significant festivity or another, why can’t we all just spread good cheer? Why can’t we stop debating about the “proper greeting” and just be kind to one another?

In all honesty, as a Christian woman, I’d be ecstatic if someone greeted me with a hearty Happy Hanukah.

Judy Marcus, a Jewish freelance writer (her blog Opinionated Woman appears on Chicagonow.com Merry Christmas vs Happy Holidays) posted, on December 7 of this year, a similar opinion. Basically a friendly greeting is appreciated even if someone says Merry Christmas.

What difference does the greeting make as long as the giver is genuinely sincere in offering it? If no malice is meant, why take offence?

As Ms. Marcus asks in her post, what would Jesus do?

Did he ever once ridicule anyone?

I would think the Christ like thing to do would be to greet everyone with friendship.

Personally, if you tell me Happy Hanukah, I’ll wish you one back. Not because I celebrate it, but because I now know you do and I’d want your holidays to be joyous for you.

The same would go for anyone else.

In my church we have a saying. The truth hurts the guilty. So to me, people who are so easily offended by a simple greeting are the people who are most guilty of not being kind human beings. They are the one passing judgment, (Matthew 7:1-4) quickly pointing out the small ‘mote’ in another’s eye hoping they won’t notice the huge ‘beam’ in their own eye.

If you are going to be offended by a simple greeting, what are you doing wrong?

Christ commanded us to not take offence.

And that is the problem. Far too many people take offence. At every little thing. Even when no offence was intended.

If I were to see Ms. Marcus on the street I would have no way to know, just from looking at her, that she is Jewish, so I could not possibly know to wish her a Happy Hanukah until after she expresses that greeting to me.

So I have a perfect solution for everyone.

Instead of trying to come up with one phrase that pleases everyone, why don’t we just use the ones we already have and everyone just greet everyone else with the one they are most comfortable with. And if you’re comfortable doing so returning the greeting of someone that is different than your own.

So I’ll say to any Jews who might read this, Happy Hanukah.

If you celebrate Kwanzaa, Have a Joyous Kwanzaa.

Whatever your celebration this season, enjoy it.

Merry Christmas.

Smile. Make the day a brighter day.