Laughter is the Best Medicine by Konnie Enos

One night as we were sitting down to dinner the phone rang. One of our then teenaged daughters answered it. It was a reminder about an activity that evening. Taking into account travel time, it gave the girls about 10 minutes to eat. We began dishing up while I turned to my husband to figure out who was driving them. It soon became clear their dad wasn’t any more eager than I was to go anywhere for any reason.

I finally offered my excuse on the assumption he, as usual, had his on. “I don’t have shoes on.”

About this point, Royce, who was at most in kindergarten, possibly first grade, appeared to be in the act of crawling under the table, he most certainly ducked his head under it.

“Neither do I.”

Royce pops back up. “Nobody has shoes on.”

Yes, we all laughed.

Anyway, since that day Royce has found it rather fun to see if he could get people to laugh, though there are so many times he manages without ever trying, just by being him.

Something that happened only a couple months into this school year is a case in point.

Due to recent events on area campuses, the school district instated random backpack checks. Since he has and will carry, concealed knives (preferably when not in school) I spoke with him about it.

His response? “The way to get through a backpack check is to be super compliant." He then mimicked going through his backpack, one item at a time. Considering he has at least four back up chargers, not to mention everything else, usually with spares, in his backpack, I was sure someone would give up fast, that and he had me cracking up.

What was even funnier is this February some girl at school got mad at Royce because she didn’t want to go to class, but as an office aide he had to make sure she did go to her class. To get away from him she told an adult my son had drugs on him. Mandatory backpack check.

I was laughing even before he described how they didn’t even finish one pocket before they declared my son wouldn’t have drugs on him.

Then there is his constant need to not be bothered when he is doing something he wants to do, like watching a show. I, however often need assistance and my children are handy people to ask for it.

One evening I wanted some help. I carefully considered who might be up and would respond. The obvious choice was Royce. I knew if I texted him he would come right in.

Within a minute he is in my room. "Why me? Why can't you ask my brother once in a while?"

I look at him for a moment. "Because I know you'll answer."

He throws his arms up. "Why do have I have to be the responsible one?"

I asked him because my very helpful daughters weren’t awake.

He still finds ways to make us laugh.

One morning my son was just entering the bathroom to get ready for school. I verified with him when he needed to be to school that day then told him and his sister to remind me at a quarter to eight to get dressed.

My son: "Why?" His eyes got big. "Are you taking me to school?"

"Of course."

He clasps his hands together and looks heavenward. "Thank the Lord!"

I assumed he was just glad he got to ride in our sedan rather than Dad's old rattle trap truck.

His sister adds: "You do realize what she's really saying is I'm driving."

He points heavenward. "Screw it!" He then slams the bathroom door shut but we can still hear him from the other side. "But I like talking."

His favorite thing right now is regularly calling his Aunt Bonnie and seeing if he can get her to laugh. He succeeds, amazingly.

But one of my favorite interactions with him happened over a year ago, about a month after his brother’s birthday.

He’d ordered something and expected it to be delivered that day. The only problem he found with it was the directions said an adult had to sign for the package. He full out panicked.

Several times he made sure I knew it was coming and that I was still there to sign for it.

Each time I told him I wasn’t the only adult in the house.

About the third time he did that I said, “You’re the only one in this family who isn’t an adult.”

“Wait a minute! You mean Tony can sign for it!”

“Yes. You’re the only one who can’t.”

Well now, as of today, my sweet lovable, and funny baby of the family can sign for his own packages. Happy 18^th birthday Royce.

Smile. Make the day a brighter day.

Burning the Midnight Oil by Bonnie Le Hamilton

I’d say I’m burning the midnight oil but it’s actually long past midnight. Not only am I not tired, but I’m supposed to be posting in a few hours, and I’m not ready.

I have a friend who complimented me this past week on posting like clockwork. Come on, let’s face it, I’m not in this blog alone, and we keep each other in line when it comes to being consistent. Consistency is a good thing. Our followers know when we’ll have something new up every Wednesday morning.

But it hasn't been easy. Actually, its dang hard, and well a few of our posts have been rather short. My last post wasn’t the first time I forgot it was my turn, and there were a few times where I wasn’t feeling well. Then there’s all the times where Konnie didn’t have time to write something.

I know of a few of our posts that were little more than a paragraph or two.

And I know I’ve said this before, but Konnie leads a busy life. I don’t. For me, getting out of the house once a day is hectic, for Konnie that’s a walk in the park. Now days, more often than not, when I call Konnie, she’s either leaving, traveling, or just returning home. 

Well, actually, that has changed this last month because one of her daughters finally got a driver’s license. So instead of Konnie having to chauffeur her all over town, she can take herself. More importantly, Melinda can run errands and chauffeur her non-driving siblings instead of Konnie doing it.

Of course, things have changed here too. I did finally get a new vehicle not too long ago. Meaning, I don’t have to forgo doing things I wanted to do because I couldn’t find a ride.

So, my social calendar has picked up a few things.

To start with, I’m a member of two different local writing groups, I’m in a book club, and participating in a group of people who knit and crochet. I’ve also recently volunteered three hours a week at the local visitor’s center and I put in the paperwork to volunteer eight hours a week helping scan genealogical information from old books into computers.

And that’s on top of giving my sister-in-law rides to, well, most of her appointments, and taking her shopping, helping her out around her place, etc.

Is it any wonder I’m way behind on things like dishes, laundry, and doing my editing and writing? Let’s face it, I’m also behind on my reading for book club, but it’s more because I’d rather read my scriptures or a Dick Francis novel than the novel the group picked for this month.

It seems, I have no problem reading Shakespeare, but Jane Austin bores me to tears. Of course, her stories read more like a synopsis than a novel, which might have something to do with it. Think about it. An almost 500-page novel, and it reads like a synopsis, as in pretty much all telling.

Talk about deadly dull!

On the other hand, Shakespeare may be in old English but it isn’t telling, or boring. And yeah, I know a lot of people who can’t understand Shakespeare at all, I’ve never had a problem understanding it. Maybe I’m just weird.

And if any of you is thinking Jane Austin’s hard to understand because of all the big words she uses, I’m afraid, I understand her except for a word or two which are no longer used today. I also understand everyone of her characters has a major case of what my concise writing professor called Cossellism, i.e. they use several big words when they all mean basically the same thing.

So, for me, as a modern-day writer, its annoying as well as boring, and I’m having trouble forcing myself to finish reading it. I’m at the end of chapter four, and I’ve barely gotten past the backstory. I think. Its hard to tell, since it’s all telling anyway. And that doesn’t include the info dumps, which frankly is all the first 3 chapters. One long info dump. To say the least, if Austin lived today, she wouldn’t be selling any novels. Not with that writing style.

Anyway, I have a lot more editing to do this month.

Happy writing (or editing) everyone!

To Trope or Not To Trope by Konnie Enos

Because Bonnie and I are twins, we have been asked about whether or not we write twin characters. Personally, a few and generally secondary characters. I don’t usually write twin characters because there is a basic flaw in portraying them.

You see there are few writers who would understand how to show two siblings are twins  without coming right out and telling that detail of their birth. I also have read very few books where the twins weren’t identical because it is the easiest trope to understand and write.

You’ve all read/seen them.

So totally alike no one, not even their own family members can tell them apart. (This is bogus by the way.)

So totally alike they have all the same likes and dislikes, dress alike, same hobbies, everything the same. (This is creepy and equally bogus.)

Or the worst one yet, they look exactly alike but one is super good and one is practically the devil incarnate. (Seriously, this is not what is meant by mirror opposites, believe me.)

Even so, these tropes are so pervasive it is not only difficult to get away from them, it is nearly impossible to convince some people this isn’t what twins are really like.

Because of this, for years I didn’t even attempt to write twins as main characters. A few secondary ones, but no main ones. I couldn’t stand drawing them as the caricatures people expect.

Then when I started writing my sci-fi two of my POV characters are twins, identical even.

I didn’t want to write them to be one of these tropes because I know that’s just not how we are.

So I wrote twins who look alike, if you don’t know them well and can’t see the differences. Twins who have a ton of different likes and aren’t exactly the same personality. Twins who are both good guys who just happen to have a brother who looks a lot like them and has the same birthday.

Easy, writing basic against the trope stuff.

I was well into my story before Bonnie pointed out I could do better. I re-read their scenes. I agreed. Then we brainstormed. What could I write to show their twinness?

We discussed the unique things we do and have done then I found ways to show these kind of things in my story. Things singletons don’t experience and probably couldn’t understand, unless they managed to find a well-crafted description.

While working on it I realized creating twin characters without relying on tropes and making them real to life twins, was not easy. And I’m a twin.

As I’m thinking about this I’m wondering if my singleton characters are more trope than real life since so many singleton writers rely on tropes to portray twins.

It’s really just a frame of reference question.

Can writers create real to life characters outside of their frame of reference?

If they are heterosexual and they create real life LBGTQ characters? If they are able bodied/healthy can they create real life disabled/health challenged characters?

Since I’ve actually only written a few twin characters, most of mine are singletons, so are they believable?

If you are writing outside your frame of reference, what kind of research do you do so you can get the character right?

That’s what I’m thinking about today, and I’d love to hear your answers.

In the meantime:

Smile. Make the day a brighter day.

Last minute Rush by Bonnie Le Hamilton

Okay, here it is. I haven’t been sleeping well the last several weeks, and I spaced that I had to do a post because of it. At this moment, I’m not even fully awake, so I’m not thinking at full capacity. I’d also like to point out that Konnie didn’t say anything to me about my post not being up yet until a half an hour ago.

Yeah, that’s right, I’m the one scrambling for something to say this week. That’s usually Konnie.

And on top of all that, its already the tenth of April and I’ve only managed to edit twenty-six pages of my manuscript this month. I’d set a goal of editing one hundred pages, so something else I’m behind on.

Actually, I’m behind on a lot of things, it’s a wonder I managed to get my rent and car payment taken care of on time. Its hard to concentrate when you can’t seem to get to sleep at a decent hour. 

Then there’s the time when I had things to do and I ended up crashing for three hours. Yeah, I needed the sleep, but I also need to get things done. A lot of things. And my list isn’t getting any shorter.

All I can say is, “Konnie, don’t wake me up at 8 o’clock on Wednesday morning saying my post isn’t up.”

Had she said something sooner, I’d have had something up already, but here it is. I spaced it was my turn and she didn’t say anything until it was too late. And now I need to at least try to get through my “To Do” list, editing Forbidden Connection included.

Happy writing, or editing as the case may be, everyone.

Hope’s Statutes On Writing a Novel By C. Hope Clark

I’m writing my tenth novel right now and have a contract for two more with a solid, reputable, traditional publisher. In looking back, I never would have forecasted that I’d be charging this strong at this stage in my life, in my second career, with not only that many mysteries behind me but also an endless list of stories to tell awaiting me up the road.

            My biggest fear is that my mental faculties fail me somewhere downstream, and I cannot write stories anymore. I finally found a profession I hope to never retire from.

            Invariably, when I speak to bookstores, libraries, book clubs, and writing conferences, I’m asked about my routine, my habits, and my beliefs in how a writer ought to pursue the business. Time after time I explain how writing is a personal decision, with personal conclusions on how to write and find happiness in the journey.

            But like Stephen King and Kurt Vonnegut and all the other famous authors have their mantras about success, over the twenty years I’ve been writing, I’ve developed statutes of my own. . . some shared with other authors and others of my own making.

1)      Write daily. If I’ve learned anything about writing, it’s that the consistent habit or reporting to work results in better writing, more writing, and quicker growth as a writer. Some argue about muses and replenishing the energy to which I say sorry. If you write for a living, you report to work. Some days are easier than others, but isn’t any job? Teachers, doctors, and engineers don’t go home because they’re having a hard day.

2)      Only read good writing. I don’t want my mind crowded with poor stories. The more brilliant writing I can read in my short lifetime, the more polished I become as a writer. Why? Because that wonderful prose and storytelling genius sticks in my head instead of a slurry of excessive adverbs and passive voice.

3)      Give back with critiques. I never would have improved without critique groups. Giving my all in red-penning a manuscript  made me hunt for mistakes, and that effort made my eye keener for spotting them in my own work. One may argue that if I only read good work, why would I critique immature work. Truth is, it takes a different section of your brain to critique than it does to read for enjoyment.

4)      Avoid passive voice. Sounds simple enough, but it’s not easy. First, you have to become familiar with recognizing it, which many writers are not. Passive voice dilutes the storytelling. It’s the epitome of telling instead of showing.

5)      Read aloud. After beating up a chapter on the screen, I print it off and read it aloud to someone. An option would be to have someone read it aloud to you, while you follow along. This habit catches way more mistakes than editing just on your computer. Then when I’ve completed an entire manuscript, I take a whole day, if not parts of two days, and read the book aloud. At this stage you look not only for glaring grammar mistakes, but check also for voice, flow, and story.

6)      Keep the pace moving. Both narrative and dialogue should propel the story forward. If you aren’t sure if a phrase, paragraph, or chapter contains strong, forward movement, then strongly question whether it’s needed.

7)      Use tags only when needed. Beats and narrative identify the speaker while helping you keep the story moving. And when you use tags, keep them extremely simple, like said and ask.

8)      End each and every chapter with a hook. It doesn’t have to be a cliff-hanger, but the story should stop at a place that makes a reader strongly question what comes next. You want to hear that readers have stayed up all night reading your book.

9)      Don’t talk openly about your pending story. Your story could change. You might not finish it. But most of all, you’ll sap the energy out of the story before you’ve written it. New writers are the most guilty of broadcasting what they are doing and how they are doing it, because they are eager for feedback. Keep your tale to yourself until it’s completed and ready to be promoted.

10)  Accept feedback with intelligent discretion. The mature writer willingly accepts feedback, and unemotionally sifts through it for worthiness. Then they either use it or discard it without a second thought. The day you can eagerly welcome feedback and use it with only your story’s improvement in mind, is the day you’ve climbed the ladder. 

Good writing takes time. It takes seasoning. Nobody is a born natural, and every successful writing reached their pinnacle from hard work. Study their habits. Analyze their work. Then steadily write, ever with improvement in mind. You will get better. You will find self-satisfaction. And you will build a readership. Serious readers always gravitate to the strong writer, and the strong writer paves his own road.

BIO

BIO:C. Hope Clark is the award-winning author of the Carolina Slade Mysteries and the Edisto Island Mysteries. During her career with the US Department of Agriculture, she met and married a federal agent-now a private investigator. She plots murder mysteries at their lakeside home in South Carolina, when she isn’t strolling Edisto Beach. Find our more about her at chopeclark.com 

LINKS

https://www.amazon.com/Dying-Edisto-C-Hope-Clark/dp/1611949424

https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/44089103-dying-on-edisto

https://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/books/1130656357

http://chopeclark.com/edisto-island/

BOOK BLURB

One death. Two detectives. And unexpected backup.
A Callie Morgan and Carolina Slade crossover, standalone mystery!
When a renowned—and now dead—travel blogger washes ashore on the banks of Indigo Plantation, Edisto Beach Police Chief Callie Morgan agrees to head the investigation as a favor to the county sheriff, whose reasons are as questionable as the death itself. When death turns to murder and a watchdog from the county makes her investigation difficult, Callie reluctantly turns to Carolina Slade and Wayne Largo, vacationing agents with the Department of Agriculture.
Because poison is growing on this plantation and someone knows how to use it well.

TESTIMONIALS

Murder, corruption, and page-turning intrigue are usually the elements that shine the brightest in mysteries like Hope Clark’s latest Dying on Edisto. But it’s the characters that bring a vivid literary element to Clark’s prose and create a strong emotional response to their tangled lives. The scenic town of Edisto Beach is peopled with a modern-day pirate claiming to be a descendent of Blackbeard, a degenerate travel blogger, a yoga teacher who drives a baby blue vintage Benz convertible, a mixed race waitress and her matriarchal grandmother, and a whole slew of wealthy and crooked good ole boys. Leading the cast are two strong female protagonists—a police chief and an investigator with the Department of Agriculture. Did someone say hemlock? —Susan Cushman, author of Cherry Bomb and editor of Southern Writers on Writing
"In a plot as complicated as the numerous waterways that create Edisto Island in South Carolina, C. Hope Clark has combined the characters from her two series to solve the murder of a renowned travel blogger. They mystery requires all of their detective skills and blends the two mystery worlds in a page-turning standalone. The story opens with a floater and progresses with edge-of-your-seat action. Prepare to be absorbed by Clark's crisp writing and compelling storytelling. This is one you don't want to miss!"--- Carolyn Haines is the USA Today bestselling author of three mystery series. She is the author of over 80 books and has received numerous writing awards.
Hope Clark converges her sleuths, Carolina and Callie Jean, on Edisto Island for the finale, Dying on Edisto, concluding her two murder mystery series. Slews of fans always awaited these highly addictive and superbly penned novels - grabbing you from the first page and not letting go until the last. A pristine, sleeper sea island, two determined masters of law who butt heads, a mystery corpse from Atlantic waters, a few idiosyncrasies along the way - the absolute best cast and plot for an intense coastal thriller. ~Karen Carter, Owner, Edisto Bookstore

April's Coming by Bonnie Le Hamilton

I can’t believe its nearly April already! Where has the year gone? And I have yet another grand-niece. Claire gave birth this past week, so yes, Konnie is a first-time grandmother, and there’s been a lot of other things going on here, but nothing so momentous as all that. I did manage to make some baby blankets and get them sent to Claire before her baby was born, just barely, which in and of itself is an accomplishment.

With me, finishing anything at all, let alone on time is an accomplishment. I tend to flit from one project to another, and since not all my creative endeavors fall in the category of writing, I haven’t been doing much of any writing, or editing, for a while. I have been knitting, sewing, and crocheting. The last two evident in the blankets I did send to Claire.

I’ve wanted to do some baking, just haven’t had the time when I had the energy to do it. (I’m blaming that on my age.)

And well, I do tend to get distracted easily, I’ve mentioned that many times before, but now I seem to have another excuse for why I don’t always stick to a task until its done, but sometimes I do stick to it (I do have 6 rough draft novels completed) anyway, my problem might be explained by an article Claire sent to Konnie (and Konnie later sent to me) about the signs and symptoms of WOMEN who are actually undiagnosed on the Autism Spectrum, and boy do a lot of those things describe me! You can find the article at http://taniaannmarshall.wordpress.com/2013/03/26/moving-towards-a-female-profile-the-unique-characteristics-abilities-and-talents-of-asperwomen-adult-women-with-asperger-syndrome/

Fair warning, it’s a rather long list. And it describes Konnie’s daughters too, which is why Claire sent it to Konnie. Claire had seen herself in the list, Konnie saw her twin and all her daughters in the list. One of the big ones was that such a woman has one of the forms of ADHD or ADD and are at lest mildly OCD. BINGO!

And that’s just one thing on that list that described me. Konnie insisted she saw more of me than any of her daughters in it, but it sure explains why her youngest daughter runs, skips, or walks up and down their hall incessantly. I’m the one who always has something in my hands to fiddle with, or I play with my hair or drum my fingers, or snack. There are other things I do. There seems to be no doubt about it.

And the first thing on the list was that such women quite often have average to high IQ’s; that’s me and Konnie's daughters. Meaning Konnie has four kids and a sister on the spectrum, not counting a niece, a nephew, and possibly a sister-in-law, that I know of.

And I’m already off track. I was going to talk about Camp NanoWriMo, which is in April (hence why I’m surprised its nearly April). Who has signed up for it? What’s your goal?

I’m going for editing 100 pages of Forbidden Connection. I really need to get that done.

Who’s with me?

And yes, I know editing isn’t writing. If this were Nano, I’d start or at least add to some unfinished story, but as I can set my own goal for the month, I’m editing.

To sign up, go to http://campnanowrimo.org/sign_in to sign up, and you can use your Nano username and password.

Anyone want to be in a cabin with me?

What are your goals for the month? What are you working on? Do you have a project in mind?

And one more note, do any of you have a story that includes April Fool’s Day? I know I have one, though I’m not much for jokes and stuff, and I only mention the little brothers of the heroine pulling pranks, but not what they are. Have any of you written a scene where the character pulls a prank, or joke on another character for April Fool’s Day?

I can personally say, that other than once trying to change places with Konnie (and that was on a dare) I’ve never pulled any April Fools pranks (something else on that list above). I have been accused of pulling April Fools prank when I wasn’t. The last time that happened my father accused me of doing so when I called and told him I was having twins on April 1^st. He told me to call him the next day and say that again.

Konnie took my side, knowing full well I wouldn’t joke about anything, let alone that! And I wouldn’t. I don’t joke, and I hardly ever get jokes. The people who can make me laugh are few and far between. And maybe I should write a character like that sometime.

Happy writing everyone!

The Stims by Konnie Enos

I honestly thought I knew what stimming was, but when my daughter started talking about it to me not long ago I found I was somewhat clueless.

You see, I can remember seeing shows where the young autistic boy was sitting and rocking or repeatedly flipping his hands back and forth. I knew people said that was stimming. I didn’t know it was only part of the picture and I should have because I have one child for sure one the spectrum and we suspect two of his now adult sisters as well. However none of them have ever done the “classical” stimming behavior.

So what is stimming?

Stimming is self-stimulating behaviors, usually involving repetitive movements or sounds.

From what I learned, nearly everybody stims in some way at some time. Biting nails, twirling their hair around a finger, drumming fingers, repeatedly tapping a pen or pencil, or constantly humming. Any habit your do to relieve tension, boredom or stress, often when you’re not aware you’re even doing it is stimming.

Usually our stimming behavior is not only harmless, but we can pick up on social cues when it’s annoying others, such as when we are drumming our fingers, and manage to stop. People with Autism don’t always pick up on the social cues and can’t easily stop because they use it to help process their environment in a way they can handle.

Remember I said my children don’t do the “classical” stimming behaviors. Well they have done things that are considered stimming behavior.

At one point my son was pulling out his hair to the point he had bald spots. My one daughter, among other things, bites her nails.

My youngest daughter, the one who brought this topic up? Well in this household we call our hallway hers. If she is home and not in her room studying or the kitchen cooking or eating then you’d better be cautious entering the hallway because she might plow into you. It’s a safe bet she’s there alternating between pacing, running and SKIPPING, up and down it, repeatedly, for hours sometimes.

As I stated, most people stim to relieve stress or boredom. There is the general belief those with Autism use stimming to decrease sensory over load, adapt to an unfamiliar environment, reduce anxiety, calm themselves, vent frustration, and/or avoid certain activities. My daughter says it helps her process information, in other words, her brain works differently. Which is the point. Autistic brains are wired differently, so they process stimulus differently.

Though why my daughter brought it up was because some people advocate the idea of stopping ALL stimming in those with Autism. I’m assuming the people who support this position feel stimming is a purely Autistic behavior and it sets these people apart from normal people and therefore to help them ‘fit in’ they have to stop the stimming.

When she mentioned this, along with a clear description of everything which constitutes stimming I had a very clear vision of me, as a young girl repeating a self-soothing behavior, one I did often without even thinking about it. My father detested me doing this and bopped me on the head, telling me to stop.

Guess what getting bopped on the head did to me.

That’s right. It stressed me out.

So my immediate response was wanting to do the very thing my father did NOT want me to do. In the end I usually left the room so he couldn’t see me. So he only got me to stop it in his presence.

I know Autistic people are wired differently but I simply can’t imagine forcing them to stop is going to have the desired effect any more than it worked on me. Plus I can’t fathom why you even need to unless their behavior is actually harmful to themselves or others or in some cases, IF they are high enough functioning to understand, when it is annoying to those around them. (That constant tapping or drumming can get on your nerves.)

When my son started giving himself bald in spots we shaved his head and pretty much kept it shaved for years. Now those bald spots have grown back and he seems to have outgrown that particular stim. We’ve encouraged my daughter in her efforts to stop biting her nails because she will chew them until she bleeds. Both these stims are self-harming.

Our youngest daughter?

We just tell anyone who visits to be careful in the hallway. It might be a bit annoying to have her going up and down the hall all the time, but she isn’t hurting anybody and we can all live with it.

Sometimes the best way to help people ‘fit in’ is to accept them just as they are. April is Autism awareness month, let’s spread the acceptance and love.

Smile. Make the day a brighter day.